


Feeding the Fire

by katbear



Series: Hot in Here and Feeding the Fire [2]
Category: Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2000-06-30
Updated: 2000-06-30
Packaged: 2017-10-21 13:53:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 31,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/225925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katbear/pseuds/katbear
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clueless!Obi-Wan eventually has an epiphany, but then has to deal with I'mNeverGoingtoBeHurtAgain!Qui-Gon</p>
            </blockquote>





	Feeding the Fire

**Author's Note:**

> Second SW:TPM story posted. Sequel to It's Hot in Here.
> 
> Archive: MA, AO3
> 
> Category: Some Romance, some Angst, AU
> 
> Rating: NC17 (Actually it's mostly PG but R/NC17 in a few parts)
> 
> Pairing: Qui-Gon Jinn/Obi-Wan Kenobi
> 
> Feedback: Appreciated.
> 
> Thanks: To the beta readers who encouraged me to post (Boots,  
> Claudia). All mistakes are my own.
> 
> Warnings: If m/m relationships/sex bother you, then you shouldn't be here.
> 
> Spoilers: None. Starts pre-TPM and goes AU
> 
> Disclaimer: The boys belong to George Lucas, I'm just borrowing them.
> 
> Author's Comment: This is a sequel to and starts immediately  
> after the end of an earlier short story, It's Hot in Here. It  
> would probably be very helpful to read the earlier story first.  
> Be advised that this story is quite a bit different though.
> 
> ~ ~ Indicates thoughts of character to self/ / / / Indicates Force messages between charactersItalics indicate emphasis

Obi-Wan Kenobi closed the door to their guest quarters softly  
behind him. As it seemed that the party their Ventalian hosts  
had thrown in celebration of the treaty was likely to go on for  
quite a while, the young man paused at the head of the stairs  
to survey the dancing in the ballroom below. It was quite a  
nice party so far, he mused to himself, but he had to agree  
with Qui-Gon; this desert heat did tend to make things rather  
sticky. He grinned rather wickedly as he thought about the  
`heat' out on the balcony that had made him decidedly sticky  
indeed. Some of the Ventalians were quite imaginative in  
expressing their appreciation for the Jedi's help.

On impulse, Obi-Wan turned back towards the quarters he was  
sharing with his Master. As long as he was up here, he would  
just slip into his own room and change into a dry shirt.  
Qui-Gon, who had left the event earlier, was probably still  
taking a shower or getting ready for bed so Obi-Wan took  
particular care to move quietly. He changed into his last clean  
civilian shirt but as he was coming from his bedroom he felt a  
faint nudge in the training bond and heard a low moan coming  
from the bathroom.

Sighing in affectionate exasperation, Obi-Wan shook his head  
and moved swiftly across the sitting room toward the bathroom.  
If it turned out that his Master really was sick after telling  
him to go back to the party he was definitely going to have  
words with that man. Pushing down on the door lever, Obi-Wan  
was surprised to find that it was locked. He hesitated for a  
moment, but another moan spurred him to action. After  
delicately picking the simple lock mechanism with a judicious  
application of the Force, the Padawan started to open the door  
but froze in surprise at the sight inside. After picking his  
jaw up from the floor, Obi-Wan had enough presence of mind to  
pull the door toward himself quietly but couldn't quite bring  
himself to fully close it. He stood mesmerized by the sight  
inside.

The inhabitants of this desert planet had been quite liberal in  
furnishing their guest quarters. The bathroom boasted walls of  
cool light blue tile and a two person jacuzzi type tub with a  
generous edging of dark blue stone and two convenient handheld  
shower outlets. Jedi Master Qui-Gon Jinn half sat, half  
sprawled on the wide ledge at the back of the tub. Six foot  
four of well-muscled and obviously aroused nakedness was  
streaming with water from a just-aborted shower. The wet hair  
hung straight back from the upraised face; the eyes were closed  
and the expression was one of rapt concentration. Seemingly  
oblivious to his surroundings, the big man slowly ghosted one  
hand down each side of his chest and across his stomach several  
times. Each skimming touch was trailed by a ripple in the  
muscles. As the left hand then delicately began to manipulate a  
nipple to hardness, the right hand moved to the face,  
fingertips softly tracing across the forehead, each eye, and  
the flushed cheeks. As each fingertip roved across the parted  
lips, it was softly licked and sucked in reverently before  
giving way to the next. The wet fingers then trailed ever so  
slowly down the exposed neck while the left hand moved its  
ministrations to the other nipple.

As the fingers continued their gentle stroking and southward  
progression on the pale, scarred torso, Qui-Gon began to  
breathe more raggedly with an occasional low moan as he  
encountered a particularly sensitive spot. By this time, there  
were two men breathing heavily; Obi-Wan found he could no more  
tear himself away from this fantastic sight than he could have  
stopped the planet in its orbit. One part of his mind was in  
denial; this surely couldn't be _his_ Master, the man who  
had always so carefully and academically discussed the required  
topics on sexuality, sometimes blushing almost as much as the  
young apprentice receiving the lesson. Another part of his  
brain, though, was enthusiastically engraving this incredibly  
erotic scene into its cells and urging a hand to move to  
assuage the growing ache in his own rapidly hardening member.  
The part of his brain that monitored reality realized that it  
might be a Very Bad Thing if Master found out he was watching  
so it slammed another layer of shielding in place.

Qui-Gon's hands had by now reached his flanks. The fingers  
massaging stomach, hips and thighs carefully skirted the hard  
rod which curved back up his belly and his hips were beginning  
to arch as the hard cock was denied the relief it craved.  
Almost as if stalking a dangerous prey, one trembling finger  
finally reached out to trace the wet slit in the exposed head.  
The contact caused a hitch in his breath and a spasm in his  
hips as Qui-Gon spread his legs wider. Swallowing hard and  
almost whimpering in need, he allowed one hand to begin  
stroking the length from root to tip while the other hand  
stealthily moved down to caress the sacs below. The water from  
the shower mixed with the sweat now sliding down his face and  
chest as the man began to moan almost incoherently.

" ... so beautiful ... want you so much ... " The right hand  
closed around its prize and began to pump as the hips thrashed.  
The iron control seemed to finally break as the writhing Master  
next began to squeeze the tightening sacs and almost  
frantically thrust and pump. "Force, I need you... want you ...  
hurts so much ..." With a final cry, the milky seed began  
spurting across the trembling belly. Sliding down into the tub,  
Qui-Gon sprawled lifelessly, head laid back on the ledge, chest  
heaving, arms hanging limply at his sides. A single tear slid  
down his cheek with a final whispered sob, "... please."

Obi-Wan started as he realized the precarious position he was  
in, peeping at his now quiescent Master with a rapidly  
spreading stain across the front of his leggings. Silently  
closing the door, he quickly relocked it, then, snagging his  
robe hanging by the outer door, found a back stairway and fled  
the building to the welcoming darkness in the outer garden. He  
had much to think about this night.

* * *

The breeze coming in from the deep desert outside the city felt  
almost cool as it caressed the heated face of the silent young  
man leaning back against the comforting bulk of the ancient  
tree. The serenity he reflected to the outside world did not  
match the swirling turmoil inside as he tried to grapple with  
his feelings about the scene he had witnessed.

On a purely physical level, Obi-Wan could still feel the  
afterglow and buzzed from the intensity of the big man's self  
stimulation. This was a side of Qui-Gon that he had never  
encountered before, and he was having a great deal of  
difficulty reconciling this person with the man that he thought  
he knew and his feelings about the whole thing. The Master to  
whom Obi-Wan was fiercely dedicated was a very private man,  
very cautious about allowing others inside the wall that  
protected his inner feelings and emotions. If ever there was a  
living embodiment of Jedi serenity, at least to the outside  
world, surely that person was Master Jinn. Qui-Gon and sex,  
well, that just wasn't making a comfortable connection in his  
Padawan's mind.

He snorted softly - Qui-Gon and sex had seldom seemed to be  
entirely compatible concepts. He remembered his Master wading  
through the various Talks, trying, not always successfully, to  
treat each as if it were an academic lecture. Obi-Wan and his  
fellow Padawans had had some good laughs when he made his  
contributions to their stories comparing the way their various  
masters did the Talks. He couldn't remember his Master ever  
bringing anyone back to their quarters at home or on a mission  
and he had never quite mustered the courage to ask. Now that he  
thought about it, he couldn't even remember the last time he  
had even seen his Master fully unclothed, never mind bringing  
home one of the many offers he still attracted from those who  
didn't know him.

Smiling ruefully, he _did_ remember that disastrous  
occasion when he was sixteen and a half. Waiting for a night  
when he thought Qui-Gon would be away from their quarters,  
Obi-Wan had invited one of his friends to his room. They had  
told the other boy's Master it was to do homework together, but  
somehow hadn't remembered to mention the class involved was  
Advanced Humanoid Sexuality. After much hesitation, fumbling  
and the occasional embarrassed giggle, the two young men had  
finally made it to a state of mutually satisfactory undress.  
The next couple of hours of groping, kissing and exploring  
resulted in a state of definitely mutual if rather sticky  
satisfaction indeed. After seeing his friend out the front  
door, though, Obi-Wan was shocked to turn around and see his  
Master leaning against the door of his own bedroom, dressed  
only in his sleep pants and robe. Oh, Qui-Gon had been nice  
enough about it during the ensuing discussion. How his feelings  
were perfectly natural, but it was considered polite not to  
share the expression of those feelings with the rest of the  
temple. He even recommended a couple of instructors for some  
advanced classes in shielding. Obi-Wan was certain that his  
face was blushing hot enough to fry bantha burgers and he could  
feel an undercurrent of discomfort coming from his Master  
through the training bond. That was the night the devastated  
apprentice vowed that he would never make himself or his Master  
have to go through anything like this again. He would not only  
learn to build adamantine shields but he would also make sure  
he never again brought anyone to their quarters to disrupt the  
quiet shared serenity of their private life. With his customary  
thoroughness, this was a vow the young man had successfully  
kept ever since.

Obi-Wan found that this train of thought wasn't really getting  
him any closer to resolving his feelings about what he had seen  
in the bathroom. All right, he knew that his Master had always  
seemed to be private and celibate; digging a little deeper into  
his memories, though, he had to admit there was at least one  
period of time when he had fantasized about his Master `that  
way'. The sophistication of twenty smiled indulgently at the  
callowness of the youth of fifteen who had once had a massive  
crush on the greatest living Jedi warrior. He did squirm a bit  
though when he remembered how many of those fantasies involved  
a passionate Jedi Master touching him the way Qui-Gon had  
touched himself tonight. Perhaps this was the source of his  
conflicting feelings, perhaps what he had felt tonight reached  
back to a part of his life he had thought to be very private  
and very securely locked away.

Pulling out this new thread from his skein of tumbled thoughts  
for a closer look, Obi-Wan tried to examine it objectively.  
Given how little he had really known about sex at the time and  
how very thoroughly Qui- Gon had quashed the romance, he  
thought he could honestly say that little episode was truly  
gone and buried. It did, however, give rise to some more  
questions. How did he feel about sex today? How did he really  
feel about his Master today? And why was the connection between  
the two causing him such disquiet?

Again trying to be as objective as possible, Obi-Wan knew that  
while he may not be the galaxy's greatest lover he was  
certainly neither naive nor stupid. These last few years he had  
come to accept the fact that he was both desirable and desired;  
in fact he had found that he enjoyed the pursuit almost as much  
as being caught. He would never deny that he enjoyed sex; it  
satisfied a deep craving he had always had for physical  
comfort, a lack of which being one of the few needs his master  
had not been able to fulfill as the apprentice grew older.  
Obi-Wan was certainly aware of his own reputation in the Temple  
and he could hardly claim not to understand the many offers he  
got on missions to humanoid planets. In looking back, however,  
he was surprised to realize just how selective he seemed to  
have really been. Aside from a small circle of close friends at  
the Temple, he had never slept with the same person more than  
once. And, reputation nothwithstanding, far more of the  
`Padawan pursuits' had ended with a kiss or a diplomatic  
refusal than had been consummated. Even allowing for the  
several missions they had been on lately, he was a bit taken  
aback when he realized that his adventure with the Ventalian  
twins tonight was the first time in almost four months that he  
had, so to speak, gotten it on. He pondered on this for a  
while; sex certainly was enjoyable and it made him feel good if  
his partner was also happy. But the more he thought about it,  
the more he began to think that perhaps the physical pleasure  
he got from this activity wasn't quite the total package of  
happiness he desired. To be honest about it, he couldn't  
remember much of any sort of emotional fulfillment from his  
extracurricular activities beyond the physical pleasure and  
momentary attachment. Aha, perhaps this was the clue he was  
seeking tonight.

Turning to a consideration of his relationship with his Master,  
the Padawan grinned. If you wanted to talk about commitment and  
emotional fulfillment, well, that side of his life had it in  
spades. Admittedly, they had gotten off to a rather rocky start  
and there were certainly plenty of times that Obi-Wan had been,  
to put it politely, less than appreciative of the things  
Qui-Gon had required of him. As he had come to know the Master  
better, however, he had come to realize that behind the Jedi  
serenity was a deeply passionate, and exceptionally  
compassionate, man. Although widely reputed to be a rebel and  
maverick, Obi-Wan knew that it was his Master's bedrock beliefs  
in the Living Force and his own interpretation of the Code that  
led him to defy the Council when he thought it was necessary.  
He had seen his Master give unstintingly of himself to help  
others, often driving himself to exhaustion or putting himself  
in great danger to do what he believed was right. There were  
times when Obi-Wan wished his Master could perhaps be a  
_little_ less obstinate and a _little_ more tactful  
with the Council, though. He didn't find it particularly  
enjoyable to get dragged along to the Council Chamber and have  
to listen to his Master being raked over the coals quite so  
often. On the other hand, it was very comforting to know that  
Qui-Gon was just as dedicated and obstinate when it came to the  
care and feeding of one each Padawan learner. For many years  
now he had known that Qui-Gon cared deeply for him and he  
willingly worked hard to entice a rare smile or word of praise  
from this man who demanded much but also gave so very much in  
return. Obi-Wan believed that it was mostly due to his Master's  
efforts that the apprentice had turned out as well as he had  
and was deeply grateful for those efforts. He knew full well by  
now that, warrior and diplomat par excellence though his Master  
was, Qui-Gon Jinn was still a man and not without his faults,  
but that only made Obi-Wan love the man all the more. Their  
training bond was widely acknowledged to be one of the deepest  
in the Order and the team of Jinn and Kenobi was given the most  
difficult missions because they were one of the best. Some of  
the happiest times he remembered were those quiet times he  
shared with his Master, studying or reading in between  
missions. He derived great emotional satisfaction from feeling  
the deep connection through their bond, knowing that he was a  
wanted part of this extraordinary man's life.

Over the garden wall, the first pale tendrils of light from the  
approaching dawn were beginning to appear. Obi-Wan realized  
that he had been thinking for several hours and had yet to  
resolve the original questions that sent him out here.

~ All right, Padawn~ he berated himself. ~ Let's be logical  
about this. What, if anything, have you actually figured out so  
far?~

~ Ok, you like sex because it gives you a real buzz, check. You  
love your Master but don't normally think of him as an object  
of lust, check. However, said Master polishing the lightsaber  
sure as Force turned you on, check ... sooooooo, is the problem  
that you are feeling like you shouldn't have been turned on  
because it was your Master? ~

Obi-Wan pondered for a few minutes.

~ Well, to be honest about it, I think part of what's really  
bothering me here is that I wasn't supposed to see that. I know  
I don't know everything about my Master; he's a very private  
man and he's certainly never really been comfortable talking  
about sex with me, but I'm beginning to think maybe that was  
because I was so young. I mean, after all, he did make sure I  
got all the lessons, he's always encouraged me to enjoy myself  
with my friends, and he rather obviously knows a little  
something about self-pleasure, at least. That is one  
_fine_ body the man has, though; I think if he showed even  
a little interest I'd have to at least think seriously about  
going after him. ~ He grimaced a little. ~ Unfortunately,  
between his silence and the Code restrictions, it doesn't look  
like that's going to be a question I have to worry about  
anytime soon. ~

~ All right, I guess at least part of the way I'm feeling now  
is guilt for violating my Master's privacy. But there's  
something more I can't quite pin down, something else that's  
bothering me about what I saw. ~ Obi-Wan paused to think about  
just what it was he thought he saw. ~ You know, Padawan, I  
think it might be what you heard that's bothering you more than  
what you saw. ~

Obi-Wan closed his eyes and used the recall exercise to replay  
the entire sequence of events in his mind. Several minutes  
later he took in a deep breath and opened his eyes. ~ That was  
no idle pleasuring, was it. ~ He paused for another deep  
breath. ~ How could I possibly have missed that, the need and  
desire in that voice. He surely seems to have it bad for  
someone. But what I heard didn't sound very happy at all. Could  
it be that Qui-Gon wants someone who doesn't want him? ~

"Oh Master. What is going on?" he whispered. "And what I am  
supposed to do now?"

The dawn was far enough advanced for Obi-Wan to distinguish  
colors in the garden and he knew he had to get back to their  
quarters soon. He still had much upon which he wanted to  
meditate, but for the time being he had decided silence was the  
best policy. Although he felt uneasy about violating his  
Master's privacy by watching him masturbate, he was far more  
concerned about the pain he had heard in Qui-Gon's voice.  
Obi-Wan decided he was going to keep an eye out when they  
returned to the Temple; if there was someone hurting his  
Master, he was going to find out what was going on and do  
something about it. Yes, that was the plan; quiet watchfulness  
would see him through. Meanwhile, he would make sure he worked  
even harder to be the best Padawan possible; his Master would  
have no extra pain caused by any shortcomings on his part! With  
his mind now set, Obi-Wan drew on his robe and returned  
silently to his room.

* * *

Obi-Wan Kenobi found the events of the next year to be both  
rewarding and frustrating. He worked hard in his studies and  
drills, successfully completing much of the required advanced  
course work in between several stressful missions.  
Concentrating on trying to unobtrusively watch his Master, he  
became more sensitive to changes and even small fluctuations in  
their bond, becoming even more closely aligned with his  
Master's feelings. This was gratifying in one aspect in that it  
allowed him to detect the depth of pride the outwardly  
undemonstrative Qui-Gon felt in his Padawan's progress. It was  
also distressing, however, because it allowed him to detect  
more of his Master's disquiet, whether it was over a failed  
mission, a disagreement with the Council or the occasional  
lapses in serenity. In addition, although he watched as closely  
as he could, short of dogging his Master's footsteps  
twenty-four hours a day, he simply could not find out if his  
Master was seeing anyone. For the most part (if you didn't  
count the occasional diatribe against another fusty Council  
decision which only his Padawan was allowed to see), Qui-Gon  
continued to be his unfailingly polite, diplomatic and serene  
self on missions and at home. Obi-Wan tried staying home more  
often, coming home earlier, coming home later, even following  
his Master on a few occasions, but, outside the many people  
they both met at official functions, Qui-Gon apparently only  
socialized with the relatively small circle of friends he had  
known for years. The closest that Obi-Wan came to noticing  
anything were a few occasions when he was certain he felt that  
same nudge in their bond that had alerted him in Vental; they  
only came, however, when he was away from their quarters and  
Qui-Gon seemed to be unaware he was letting anything slip.

There were more changes that year. For the last few years  
Qui-Gon had been gradually entrusting his Padawan with more  
responsibility on their missions but he now began allowing him  
to write entire mission reports and gave him some opportunities  
to present the mission debriefing to the Council. The first  
time Obi-Wan did both the report and briefing his stomach was  
fluttering so badly he was afraid he was going to throw up  
right there in the Council Chamber but Qui-Gon unobtrusively  
sent a flow of reassurance over their bond. With that support,  
he even managed to earn smiles from both his Master and Yoda  
after successfully fending off several pesky questions from  
various Council Members. Although appreciative of the increased  
professional responsibilities and personal freedom that came  
with being a Senior Padawan, Obi-Wan regretted that his Master  
was decreasing even further their already minimal physical  
contact. Although Obi-Wan still had occasional liaisons with  
friends, he had continued to speculate more and more on the  
attractiveness of sharing the physical side of his life with  
this man with whom he already shared such a deep emotional  
link.

After almost a year, the frustration began to reach a crescendo  
in the Padawan. Obi-Wan noticed that his Master had begun to  
spend more time away from him in meditation, there were more  
occasions when Obi-Wan believed he could detect an aching  
sadness leaking through his Master's shields, but he still had  
not been able to find even a clue about who or what was causing  
his Master such distress. And his Master continued to push him  
away physically. Six months after Vental, Qui-Gon abruptly  
began sleeping on the floor when they only had one bed on a  
mission and sent his apprentice to another Master for the  
required advanced work in hand to hand combat skills. Almost  
nine months after Vental, they were on a mission to a planet  
deep in its winter cycle when they were caught out in the open  
for two nights. Qui-Gon had not only refused to share bedrolls  
for warmth but had actually rather caustically reproved his  
apprentice for his shortcomings in the ability to control his  
internal temperature. Although they weren't in any immediate  
danger of freezing, Obi-Wan was hurt by his Master's brusque  
rejection of what he had thought to be a common sense  
suggestion. The final straw, though, was the annual competition  
at the Temple.

Aside from meditating together, one of the most intense and  
pleasurable aspects of Obi-Wan's relationship with his Master  
was their lightsaber training. They both enjoyed the physical  
exertion but even more they enjoyed the connection it gave them  
with the Force. Once Obi-Wan had finally learned to fully  
center himself and give himself over to the Force when they  
sparred, the two men had found that their sparring sessions  
raised them both to new heights of physical and emotional  
focus. Best of all, however, was when they fought together as a  
team. It was then that the Force joined them together, allowing  
them to function as one being. It was beyond anything Obi-Wan  
had ever felt with any other person and it also made them a  
very formidable team. They were the only Master-Padawan team to  
win the open pairs lightsaber competition two years in a row  
and Obi-Wan had been looking forward to defending their title  
this year. Fortunately, their mission schedule allowed them to  
be on Coruscant in time to practice and participate. The  
competition this year proved to be exceptionally challenging  
but Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan made it to the finals and found  
themselves facing a veteran Master-Knight bonded pair who had  
recently returned from another temple. The last match was a  
long and grueling affair which pushed both teams to their  
limits but eventually Qui-Gon's superior swordsmanship began to  
tell. With the Force pulsing in the air and seemingly directing  
their movements, they were able to finally vanquish their foes  
when Qui-Gon boldly took on both Jedi in a fierce offensive  
which gave Obi-Wan enough time to slip behind them and disarm  
the Master, leaving Qui-Gon to make short work of the remaining  
Knight. Streaming with sweat and chests heaving, the triumphant  
pair saluted their opponents, then turned to each other with  
big grins. Obi-Wan had never felt so at one with his Master and  
could still feel the Force singing through their bond and  
swirling around them. His Master's eyes were shining with the  
pride and joy that Obi-Wan could clearly feel across their  
bond. Qui-Gon reached out to offer a rare hug which was eagerly  
returned by his euphoric Padawan. Suddenly, however, Qui-Gon  
stiffened and pushed the young man away, slamming down his  
shields so suddenly that Obi-Wan felt like he had been kicked  
in the gut. Stepping back, Qui-Gon murmured a quiet "Well done,  
Padawan", before wheeling away and leaving his stunned  
apprentice to stare after him in bewilderment. Only half  
hearing the many congratulations that accompanied them as he  
followed his Master through the crowd and out of the arena,  
Obi-Wan gritted his teeth and decided he was going to find out  
what was wrong with Qui-Gon Jinn if it killed him.

* * *

  


* * *

The next opportunity soon arrived. Several of Obi-Wan's friends  
were all back on Coruscant at the same time and they decided to  
get together for a party. Obi-Wan was able to rearrange his  
schedule so the morning after the party was free and made sure  
to notify his Master well in advance about the party and the  
fact that he expected tobe gone the entire night. As the date  
grew closer, Obi-Wan mentioned the party frequently, making  
several suggestive comments about the activities he was  
`looking forward to' in order to reinforce the idea that he  
would be gone all night. In the mean time, he practiced his own  
shielding and worked on a plan for the night of the party to  
convince his friends he was sick so he would be able to slip  
back to the quarters he shared with his Master.

Obi-Wan spent the afternoon prior to the party keeping an eye  
on Qui- Gon. Dressed only in an old pair of workout leggings,  
he lounged on the couch in their common area, ostensibly  
catching up on reading while surreptitiously watching Qui-Gon  
prepare for a senior Padawan seminar he was teaching. When he  
saw that his Master had started going through his mail  
messages, Obi-Wan solicitously brought over a cup of tea and  
lingered for a while, idly making small talk as he tried to get  
a glimpse of the mail. Getting nothing but a strange look from  
his Master for his trouble, he returned to the couch until it  
was time to get ready.

Coming out of the shower with a small towel draped low on his  
hips, Obi-Wan padded over to the kitchen where his Master was  
nibbling on some fruit slices. When Obi-Wan politely asked if  
there was anything his Master needed before he went to the  
party, Qui-Gon hastily backed out of the enclosed area and  
returned to his desk mumbling a polite refusal. The Padawan  
went to his room to dress and began carefully leaking tiny  
tendrils of suggestive anticipation over the training bond to  
reinforce the idea that he would be out all night. Returning to  
the common room in kneehigh black boots, tight black leggings  
and loose pale blue spidersilk tunic, Obi-Wan stopped by his  
Master's desk, casually perching one hip on the edge.

"Are you sure there's nothing else you need, Master?"

"Quite sure. I'll be busy here for a while as I still have some  
more changes I want to make for this seminar," Qui-Gon replied,  
not taking his eyes off the monitor screen. "Aren't you running  
a little late?"

"Well, the starting time was rather flexible, but I guess I  
should be getting along. Wouldn't want to miss out on any of  
the _good_ stuff," Obi-Wan smiled and winked suggestively,  
letting a few more images spill over the bond.

"Uh, yes, of course." Qui-Gon mumbled. "Don't forget that we  
promised to help with the initiates beginning lightsaber class  
tomorrow afternoon. Good night, and, uh, have a nice time."

"Of course, Master. Good night, Master, don't wait up," Obi-Wan  
waved breezily as he headed out the door.

Obi-Wan hurried through the Temple to the quarters where the  
friends had agreed to meet before heading out. Along the way he  
began running and also adjusting his internal temperature  
upward just enough so that by the time he arrived he was  
flushed and sweating. Volubly complaining about how queasy he  
had been feeling all day, within a half hour he managed to  
convince everyone that he was greatly disappointed, but he just  
couldn't make it feeling like this, and he headed back across  
the Temple towards his own quarters. Obi-Wan then hid in a  
maintenance closet down the hall from his quarters and  
implemented the next part of his plan. He had been putting  
carefully planned leaks across the bond and now he began to  
adjust them first to spike as if he was excited about heading  
out for the night and then slowly diminishing the leaks as if  
he were getting farther away until he cut them off altogether.  
Setting his own shields at maximum, Obi-Wan then began a very  
slow and cautious Force sweep of his own quarters but could  
only feel Qui-Gon's Force signature. He kept the door cracked  
to detect anyone who was shielded coming down the hall, then  
settled in to wait.

For over an hour nothing happened. Obi-Wan didn't see anyone  
enter their quarters nor could he detect any Force signatures  
other than Qui- Gon's. He was beginning to think it was going  
to be another wasted night when he caught a faint nudge through  
the training bond. Although he still had not seen anyone enter  
their quarters, it felt the same as the sensation he remembered  
from Vental, so he walked down the hall to their door,  
carefully rehearsing his story about being ill in case his  
quarry was in the common room. Palming the door lock, he  
stepped inside, then stood silently looking around the room.  
The lights were at half strength but no one was in the room;  
even the fresher looked dark and empty through its half closed  
door. He could feel only Qui- Gon's Force signature in the  
larger bedroom, but there was a small undercurrent of distress  
leaking across their bond. Suddenly, there was a crash of a  
small object hitting the wall inside the bedroom, followed by  
the sound of rapid pacing. Obi-Wan tightened his own shields as  
far as he could while still maintaining contact with his  
Master, then crept silently across the room until he could peer  
through the small opening the slightly open door made. He  
stopped, listening with barely drawn breaths, to his Master  
arguing ... with himself?

" ... how long are you going to keep up this nonsense, you old  
fool?"

"For as long as it takes. I _will_ finish this."

"You've been hiding for almost three years and it's getting  
harder all the time. How long do you really think you can you  
keep your secret?"

"I am a Jedi. I will do what is necessary for as long as  
needed."

"At what cost? You can't stand to be near him but you burn  
inside when he leaves you. Tonight you couldn't even begin to  
meditate for thinking of what he is doing out there and the  
hunger of your flesh cries out to be fed like a ravening wolf."

"There is no passion, there is serenity. I will control this  
because I must."

"And if you still believe that, you're a bigger fool than you  
realize. It would be so easy to end your pain."

"I have no right."

"He is a kind and compassionate man. All you have to do is ask;  
you know he would do anything for you, anything to help you."

"NO! It is because I know he would say yes that I can not, dare  
not, say anything. I would rather never see him again than see  
pity in his eyes or taste the disgust of duty in his kiss."

"You know he is devoted to you, you have felt it in the Force.  
He would come willingly and be happy about it. One word, even a  
hint, and you could have him."

"It is wrong. My duty is to protect, to teach, not to harm.  
Even if today he believed he came to me willingly, he would  
hate me later when he came to understand how I used him. I will  
not let my darkness stain his beautiful light."

"Then send him away before you break down and do something you  
will both regret."

"I cannot..." he whispered. "Force help me, I cannot..."

Obi-Wan opened the door just enough to see Qui-Gon stop pacing  
and fling himself on the bed. He was lying face up, one arm  
across his sweating face, his member rigid. They were close  
enough that Obi-Wan could feel a wave of need and desire across  
their bond and he could see his Master's Force signature  
swirling with red-tinged distress.

Suddenly, Qui-Gon reached down to wrap one huge hand around his  
turgid phallus. There was no foreplay or innocent pleasure,  
only a punishing need as he savagely fisted up and down,  
thrusting his hips wildly. Low, incoherent moans filled the air  
as he drove himself to a shattering climax, seed spilling  
across his trembling belly. Shuddering in the aftermath,  
Qui-Gon sprawled across the bed, crying softly, "Obi-Wan, my  
beautiful Obi-Wan.."

* * *

Stunned into immobility, Obi-Wan could not think or even  
breathe for several long moments. He finally mustered enough  
strength to move away from the door and lean against the wall  
or he would have fallen where he stood. Shaking his head in  
disbelief, Obi-Wan was having great difficulty wrapping his  
mind around this unexpected revelation. It surely couldn't be  
true, could it? But, what if it was true? He had been searching  
for a year and had yet to find anyone else that Qui-Gon might  
be seeing. And if it was true, it would certainly explain many  
of Qui-Gon's actions. Obi-Wan's thoughts were whirling in  
disarray and his heart was pounding so hard he was afraid  
Qui-Gon would hear it through the wall. He _had_ to know,  
just had to. He drew in several slow, deep breaths; he had to  
calm himself if he intended to talk to his Master about this.  
Looking down, he also realized that he had definitely better  
change clothes or this conversation was probably going to go  
nowhere fast. The Padawan crept silently across to his own  
room, clamping his shields down as hard as he could and hoping  
that Qui-Gon was still distracted enough not to have noticed  
any lapses.

Having changed into his standard boots, legging and tunics,  
Obi-Wan turned up the lights in the common room and loosened  
his shields enough to make his presence felt. He strode over to  
Qui-Gon's door, took a deep breath, and knocked loudly. Not  
hearing anything, he knocked again, then swung the door open  
wide.

"Master, there is something important we need to discuss."

Qui-Gon, still lying naked on his bed, snatched at a sheet to  
cover himself. "Padawn, you're back early," he said flatly, not  
quite looking directly at the young man.

"Yes, Master. I need to speak with you, please."

"Was there a problem at the party?"

"No, Master. I ended up not going out with the party and came  
back here. I wish to speak about ... our relationship."

Qui-Gon paled, clutching the sheet a little closer to his  
chest. "How ... how long have you been back?

"Long enough. We need to talk, Qui-Gon," Obi-Wan said softly.

A heavy silence stretched between the two men. Finally, Qui-Gon  
sighed. "Very well, Padawan. Wait in the common room."

"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan bowed and went to sit at one end of the  
couch.

Ten minutes passed before Qui-Gon finally came out, fully  
dressed, and sat down in the lone chair. He looked at his  
apprentice for a moment, then said quietly, "What is it you  
wish to discuss, Padawan?"

Obi-Wan looked squarely across, took a deep breath, and began.  
"Master, please understand that everything I have done, and  
everything I am about to say, is because I love you. You have  
been the best Master anyone could ask for and I appreciate all  
that you have done for me. But when you hurt, it hurts me, and  
I have been aware for a while now that all is not well with  
you."

"What are you talking about, Padawan," Qui-Gon interrupted.

"I have a confession to make, Master," Obi-Wan replied,  
flushing slightly. "About a year ago, on the mission to Vental,  
you remember that party the last night?"

Qui-Gon nodded.

"Well, I went back to our room early, and, uh, well, I heard  
you in the bathroom. I thought perhaps something was wrong,  
that you might be ill, especially when I found that the door  
was locked, and, as that was so unlike you, I unlocked the door  
and I saw you ... pleasuring yourself. I'm sorry, but it was so  
unexpected and I just couldn't seem to tear myself away. I  
would be lying if I said I wasn't ... aroused by what I saw but  
I was also very disturbed. I spent the rest of that night  
meditating; after a very great deal of thought I finally came  
to the conclusion that you must have had someone special in  
mind and it didn't seem like a very happy relationship. During  
this last year I have been working very hard so you wouldn't  
have to worry about shortcomings on my part, and, well, maybe  
it wasn't really any of my business, but you seemed to be  
getting more distant and more unhappy, so I sort of took it on  
myself to find out who was responsible and, I don't know, I  
guess I thought I was going to knock some sense into them. I  
could never find out who it was, so tonight I made another  
attempt. The party was just an excuse to make you think I was  
gone, I came back early and ... I ... I heard everything that  
happened in your room a little while ago."

Obi-Wan paused, then swiftly rose and went to kneel in front of  
Qui- Gon, reaching up to gently clasp his hands. "If it was me  
that you wanted all this time, I swear to you, Master, I had no  
idea, and I am very sorry for any of my actions that have  
caused you pain. I love you, Master, and if there is anything I  
can do for you, anything at all, you have but to name it and  
you know that I will do it gladly. Please, tell me what I can  
do or give you to help you."

Qui-Gon sat absolutely still, eyes startlingly blue in a face  
gone dead white. "Padawan..." he whispered, "my Obi-Wan." After  
a long moment, he tore his hands away and began pacing.

"You don't understand, my Padawan. I can not possibly ask this  
of you, it is both wrong and forbidden." He held up his hand to  
silence the apprentice's protest. "Please hear me out." Qui-Gon  
continued to pace silently for a few moments as if gathering  
his thoughts.

"Nine years ago, I was a lonely and embittered man. I had sworn  
that I would never let anyone get close enough to hurt me ever  
again. I would do my duty as a Jedi but I was adamant that I  
would also never take another Padawan. I fought very hard  
against taking you as my apprentice, Obi-Wan, even though the  
Force was telling me it was the right thing to do. For the pain  
that I caused you then, I am so sorry, and I have repented my  
actions a thousand times over, for you have turned out to be  
the best Padawan anyone could ever ask for. You are truly a  
beautiful young man, strong in the Force that shines from  
within you, and will be a great Jedi Knight. I have tried to be  
a good Master to you, to teach you and care for you. I know I'm  
not perfect, far from it, but until the last few years I had  
hoped I was doing at least an adequate job, for I could see the  
wonderful person you were becoming despite my shortcomings."  
Qui-Gon paused in his pacing to gaze somberly at the young man  
still kneeling silently.

"Obi-Wan, I have always loved you as a father, as a teacher,  
and as a friend." He looked down at the floor, closed his eyes,  
then drew a deep breath and began pacing again. "I have always  
tried to encourage you to develop as your own person, as your  
own man, but it was only in the last few years that I finally  
realized that you really had grown up and I began to see you as  
others do, that you have become an incredible young man, a  
beautiful, sexy, very desirable young man. I will not lie to  
you; I have to tell you that I have to come to desire you, to  
love you, as one man does another. I know I can't have you and  
it is wrong to even think of it, but this lust has infected me  
for three years now; it is my personal failure and I have tried  
to not let it affect your training. If I have failed in this  
attempt, I am sorry, my Padawan." Qui-Gon sat down at the end  
of the couch and buried his face in his hands.

"Master, you have not failed me, for so many years you have  
given me so much, taught me so much, I know I could never have  
become what I am today without you. I have come to know and  
love the man that few others know; I understand it's not been  
your way to show it but I do know how deeply you care for me. I  
care just as deeply for you, my Master, and it hurts me very  
much to see you in pain. On Vental I first began to see  
_you_ as a man, a very desirable man; I have seriously  
considered what it would be like to make love to you. I have  
also looked at what the Code actually says; Master-Padawan  
relationships are not totally forbidden, it _is_ possible  
to get permission from the Council in special cases. You know  
we already have an exceptionally deep bond; when I am with you  
in the Force it is the most incredible feeling in the galaxy,  
and it could surely only be good to make our relationship even  
more complete. I'm not a child, I understand what I am  
offering, and I want to do it. Please, Master, let me help you,  
let me give back to you some small measure of all that you have  
done for me."

Qui-Gon slowly raised his head to gaze at his apprentice,  
leaving his hands tightly clasped together. "You don't know  
just _how_ tempting your offer is," he said softly, then  
sighed. "But you still don't fully understand, my Padawan. If  
you have looked at the Code, then you also know that the waiver  
is almost never granted. It is for the benefit and protection  
of both Master and Padawan that this rule exists. The  
Master-Padawan relationship is inherently unequal and the  
potential for abuse, even unintentionally, is tremendous. On  
the Padawan's part there is the ingrained requirement to obey  
and a desire to please the Master; on the Master's part is the  
temptation to take what is offered and more besides. You have  
also not considered the part played by the training bond and  
how much it colors your feelings; it is intended specifically  
to draw the Master and Padawan close together to facilitate the  
ability to train. Our bond is deeper than most and has given us  
the ability to connect very closely in the Force, but there is  
no guarantee that any part of that bond or closeness will  
survive your knighting. In fact, the bond is usually completely  
terminated and, at best, Master and former Padawan may remain  
good friends. All of which brings me to another point." Qui-Gon  
paused, then hung his head to stare at the floor before  
continuing. "Obi-Wan, I have to tell you that there are still  
some things you don't know about me. What I feel for you, the  
need that fills my dreams, could very easily overwhelm me if I  
were to take what you think you are offering. Love can be a  
beautiful thing but lust can quickly turn ugly and is a very  
jealous god. If once we started, I don't think I could stand to  
share you with others, and I know I won't be able to stop  
without breaking down. And I would always have doubts, not  
knowing for certain if you truly wanted a jealous old man for  
your lover or if it was the bond or a sense of duty leading you  
to my bed. I am even more afraid of the things that I would be  
tempted to do or say to bind you to me, even to the point of  
trying to hold you back from reaching your knighthood so our  
bond would not be dissolved."

Qui-Gon lifted his head, then slid down from the couch to kneel  
opposite his apprentice and look into his eyes. "Obi-Wan  
Kenobi, it has been my privilege and my joy to be your Master,  
and as your Master, it is my duty to help you become the best  
Jedi Knight that you can be. I can not, I _will_ not, do  
anything which might interfere with that duty. You are too  
young to fully understand and commit to the kind of  
relationship this could turn into and I am afraid of the harm I  
would almost certainly do to you if I allowed this to happen.  
You are a wonderful Padawan and a good man; I truly appreciate  
your offer, but as long as you are my Padawan, it simply can't  
be. I am a Jedi Master, I will find the strength to do the  
right thing and see that you are knighted. Once you become a  
Knight, if you should ever truly return these feelings, I would  
welcome another discussion of these matters, but until then I  
believe it would be better for both of us if we speak no more  
of this."

"Master, it could be years before I take my Trials. Surely  
there must be some way ..."

Qui-Gon interrupted, "Please, don't. I appreciate what you are  
trying to do, and I love you all the more for your generous  
spirit, but it simply can not be."

"I'm not sure I entirely understand or agree with all of your  
reasons, Master, but I will obey your will in this matter, at  
least for now. But is there nothing at all I can do to help?"

"Well, I think the best thing is to continue to work toward  
your Knighthood and maintain a professional relationship,"  
Qui-Gon replied. Barking a short laugh, he gave a half-smile  
and went on, "It would truly be a kindness, though, if you  
wouldn't mind wearing a little more than that tiny towel when  
you get out of the shower."

* * *

  


* * *

During the next two years, Master and Padawan worked hard to  
advance the apprentice's skills. By unspoken agreement, they  
slowly developed a new set of rules for their personal  
relationship. Obi-Wan adopted his Master's reticence about  
personal appearance and refrained from wandering about their  
quarters in various states of undress. They both refrained from  
physical contact with each other although Qui-Gon began making  
special efforts to let his Padawan know when he was pleased  
with the young man's achievements and progress. They still  
meditated together and, if anything, spent even more time  
working on katas and sparring, both men finding that the extra  
physical effort and connection in the Force enabled them to  
achieve a certain measure of serenity and contentment. On the  
numerous missions with limited accommodations, Qui-Gon even let  
Obi-Wan rotate with him so they took turns sleeping on the  
floor.

Obi-Wan took particular care to minimize any references to his  
own sexual activities. He dressed more conservatively and tried  
to keep a lower profile at functions. With the heavy workload  
both men had undertaken, Obi-Wan found that he had less and  
less time to socialize and had also developed quite a  
sensitivity to his Master's presence; this tended to limit his  
liaisons more and more to those occasions when either he or  
Qui-Gon were separated due to mission or academic requirements.  
Although he missed the physical contact comfort, he had  
developed several meditation routines to help and resorted to  
the occasional self-pleasuring to relieve the physical  
frustration. One thing he could not entirely avoid, however,  
was the attention he still attracted on missions and at  
official functions; he knew the pain it caused his Master and  
tried to very discreetly let his Master have extra time for  
meditation or other necessary activities on those occasions.  
Given his previous high level of visibility, though, it was  
inevitable that at some point his new inactivity would be  
noted; in fact, it came to a head about a year after their  
confrontation when they both attended the annual party given at  
the Temple to honor those reaching adulthood.

Qui-Gon left the party relatively early to retire to his  
quarters and read. He was surprised to see his apprentice come  
in less than a half hour later and head for the kitchen.

"Padawan," he called.

"Yes, Master?"

"Would you please come here a moment?"

Obi-Wan brought the fruit juice he had retrieved and flopped  
down on the couch.

"Yes, Master, what can I do for you?"

"I was just wondering ... we don't get too many opportunities  
like tonight for you to see your friends and you're back rather  
early. Is anything wrong?"

Obi-Wan smiled and took a drink of juice. "It was a very nice  
party and I enjoyed myself. I danced a lot, got to see several  
friends, even the food was good tonight. I just felt it was an  
appropriate time to leave."

Qui-Gon hesitated, "Uh, Obi-Wan ... I ... overheard several  
people talking tonight. It appeared they were concerned about  
you, and, uh, well, that you weren't, you know, seeing anyone  
..." he trailed off uncertainly.

"Master," Obi-Wan said gently, "are you trying to say they were  
gossiping because they think I'm no longer out screwing half  
the Temple?"

The older man flushed and rubbed the bridge of his nose, then  
said faintly, "well, something like that..."

The apprentice shrugged. "It happens to be true. It's my  
business who I choose to sleep or not sleep with and it doesn't  
particularly bother me what other people might think of those  
choices."

"Obi-Wan, if this is because of me, please don't. It's none of  
my business what you do privately and it was never my intention  
that I cause you to have to enjoy your life less because of any  
shortcomings on my part. I appreciate what you are trying to  
do, but you don't have to do this."

The Padawan sat up straight and looked across into his Master's  
eyes. "Master Jinn, for quite some time now you have strongly  
encouraged me to act as an adult and make my own decisions as  
an adult. Well, I have done so and I'm going to tell you about  
those decisions. First, it is _my_ choice as to my level  
of sexual activity and if I choose to reduce that level or even  
stop altogether, then, as you just pointed out, it's none of  
your business, particularly since it is not having any effect  
on my level of performance in other areas. Second, even though  
I don't totally agree with them, I accepted your reasons for  
not allowing us to have a physical relationship. That doesn't  
mean I care for you any less; therefore, if I can't help you, I  
will at least try not to do anything to hurt you. Third, I have  
decided it really irritates the hell out of me every time you  
refer to your feelings for me like you have some kind of  
terrible disease or mental defect. If I'm such a horrible evil  
monster that loving me is insane, then send me away, otherwise  
please accept the fact that your feelings are normal and I  
don't object to them. Now, if you are the man I believe you to  
be, you will honor my decisions and we will not need to speak  
of this again. It is up to you, Master."

"Oh," Qui-Gon said, appearing rather taken aback. He paused as  
if gathering his thoughts, then drew a deep breath. "You are  
correct, Padawan. You are certainly old enough to be  
responsible for those kinds of decisions and I apologize for  
any interference. Please believe me when I say I spoke only  
because I was concerned about you."

"I understand, Master. You don't need to apologize for caring."

Looking over the obstinate set of the young man's face, Qui-Gon  
smiled and continued. "You know, I'm beginning to strongly  
suspect that, even if I gave you a direct order to forget about  
me and go out and have sex, you aren't going to pay much  
attention to whatever I may have to say in this matter, are  
you?"

"No, Master."

"Well, that's that, then. I'm going to turn in. Good night,  
Padawan."

Obi-Wan stood and bowed. "Good night, Master."

Qui-Gon walked toward his bedroom, then stood for a moment,  
hand on the doorknob. Straightening his shoulders, he turned  
around and looked at the apprentice still standing in the  
middle of the room. "You are a good man, Obi-Wan Kenobi. I love  
you." Then he disappeared into his room.

* * *

During this time, the Padawan continued to meditate to try to  
achieve a clearer understanding of how he felt toward his  
Master and what their future relationship might be. He had  
carefully considered several factors. Obi-Wan had concluded  
that the physical aspects would be not just acceptable but very  
desirable. Although Qui-Gon insisted on calling himself old,  
Obi-Wan saw a man in the prime of life, strong and vigorous,  
who still attracted attention and offers almost everywhere he  
went. With his Jedi abilities and healthy lifestyle, it was far  
more likely that he would be killed on a mission before his  
physical skills declined significantly. Obi-Wan was a little  
concerned with his Master's contention that Qui-Gon would be a  
jealous and possessive lover, but felt that if he was going to  
make a commitment to this man, it would be total and they could  
work through any such feelings either of them had. Emotionally,  
he felt they had enough similarities to be comfortable and  
enough differences to keep life interesting. The man could be  
stubborn and exasperating and certainly had a unique  
perspective on the Code but this was more than offset by deep  
kindness and generosity. And of course there was one aspect of  
their current relationship that was almost universally noted;  
this was a team that worked well together and got things done.  
They had good complementary skills and Obi-Wan enjoyed their  
close teamwork and the feeling of satisfaction from  
accomplishing what few others could. Qui-Gon had been treating  
his apprentice more and more as an equal these last few years  
and Obi-Wan eagerly anticipated continuing to work with  
Qui-Gon, whether on missions, sparring, teaching or whatever  
else the Council needed.

There was one thing, though, that greatly troubled the young  
man. One of the greatest joys of his life was his bond with his  
Master and his connection with him in the Force. He thought  
often of Qui-Gon's comment that the training bond did not  
survive a Padawan's Knighting. Extensive research on the nature  
of the bond caused him even more concern; he found that not  
only was the bond terminated but while in place it usually had  
a great influence on the feelings between Master and Padawan.  
After Knighting, most pairs not only lost their direct link but  
the degree of affection and closeness usually significantly  
decreased, leaving both members of the pair free to form new  
relationships. If it had been a good relationship the two  
usually maintained the closeness appropriate for a teacher and  
favorite student or a parent and child but seldom anything  
more. The more he learned, the more Obi-Wan began to question  
his own conclusions about the nature of his relationship with  
his Master and where he wanted to go with that relationship in  
the future. If the depth of his current feelings was mostly the  
result of the training bond and might vanish later, why bother  
trying to figure out something he couldn't control? And worse  
yet, what if he still felt attracted to Qui-Gon but his  
Master's feelings toward him changed? His uncertainties finally  
drove him to seek an appointment with Master Yoda.

Obi-Wan walked through the Meditation Garden toward the stone  
bench where the small Jedi Master was sitting with eyes closed  
and chin resting on hands clasped atop his gimmer stick. The  
young man waited patiently in the warm afternoon sun until Yoda  
opened his eyes and acknowledged his presence.

"Padawan Kenobi, a question you have?"

Obi-Wan bowed, then folded himself gracefully to sit in the  
grass at the Master's feet. "Master Yoda, I have been trying to  
understand the nature of the training bond and the effect it  
has on the feelings of a Master and Padawan for each other. Is  
it true that the training bond makes them like each other?"

"Affection the training bond itself does not really create.  
Attraction, desire to please, desire to protect, ability to  
communicate, does the bond enhance, more for some, less for  
others."

"But if a Master and Padawan do like each other a lot, how much  
of that goes away when the Padawan is Knighted?"

"Difficult question, that is. True it is, that most become much  
less close after the bond is broken. I think, though, that  
concern you have is for Master Jinn, not others, yes?"

"Well, for both of us, I guess. I care for my Master very much.  
He is a great man and a great Jedi."

Yoda's ears perked up, "Agree with that many on the Council  
would not, you know."

"They don't know him like I do. I may not always agree with  
everything he does but he only tries to do good for others.  
Qui-Gon is a very kind and generous man, just a bit ...  
unconventional," the young man vehemently replied.

"Peace, young Padawan," Yoda replied with a smile. "Tell the  
other Council members you will not, but agree with you I do,  
and good for stirring up stodgy Council the man is. My Padawan  
your master was, and well known to me his good heart is."

"I know. My apologies, Master Yoda, I didn't mean to be  
disrespectful."

"From the heart you speak, no offense did I take. But concerned  
you are about what will be in two hearts after your Knighting."

"Yes, Master. We have a wonderful relationship now, what I feel  
for him in the Force is like nothing I have felt with anyone  
else. I know everyone says that our bond is deeper than most  
but I don't understand if that means that it just makes our  
real feelings deeper or caused them. I'd really like to be with  
Qui-Gon after I'm knighted but I'm confused about how we are  
going to feel about each other."

"Hmm ... know you about your Master's feelings for you?"

Obi-Wan blushed a little. "We have talked about that. His  
feelings go beyond that of Master for Padawan, but he refuses a  
physical relationship. He doesn't even really like to talk  
about it and told me I have to wait until after I'm Knighted."

"A very private man is Qui-Gon Jinn, hard is it for him to  
speak of such personal things. Reasons he has for guarding his  
heart; much pain has he suffered in the past."

"I've heard some of the stories about his last apprentice,  
Xanatos, but my Master never speaks of what happened."

"Surprising that is not, but more than Xanatos binds his heart.  
A young Knight was Qui-Gon when first he loved. Three years  
they had until on a mission she was killed while Qui-Gon was on  
Coruscant. Then came Xanatos a few years later. Much affection  
Qui-Gon had for his second apprentice and long blamed himself  
for letting his feelings blind him to Xanatos' true nature,  
blamed himself for Xanatos' turning even though it was none of  
his doing. Swore he did that never again would he give himself  
to another."

Obi-Wan thoughtfully twisted a blade of grass between his  
fingers. "I knew he didn't want another Padawan but I didn't  
really understand why. No wonder we had so many problems that  
first year." He paused, then looked up at Yoda. "But he says  
that he loves me, and I have felt through our bond that it is  
true. What will happen to him if I don't feel the same way  
after I'm Knighted?"

"Hard to say it is. When allows himself to feel he does, your  
Master's feelings run very deep indeed. Strong feelings for you  
I believe Qui- Gon will still have, but pursue you or risk  
hurting either of you he will not, far too proud and stubborn  
that man is. Your own feelings you will have to learn. After  
Knighting, time you will have to explore those feelings. If  
desire for your Master you still have, convince him you will  
have to work hard to do, Padawan."

Obi-Wan stood up and bowed. "I think I understand, Master Yoda.  
I guess I will just to wait, then. Thank you for your time."

* * *

For two weeks the team of Jinn and Kenobi had worked nonstop to  
help evacuate people from the flood-ravaged northern continent  
of Gevnok. They had been called in on their way back from  
finishing another month-long mission on nearby Julstin since  
they were the closest Jedi. The two men had split up to better  
assist the Republic rescue teams, then rejoined on the ship  
carrying the most badly injured people back to Coruscant for  
advanced medical care. Unfortunately the only large ship  
immediately available had been an old freighter, so both men  
were kept busy on the entire trip helping the medical team care  
for their patients in the inadequate facilities. By the time  
they got back to the Temple, both men were dirty, cold, hungry  
and dead-tired.

Entering their quarters, the two Jedi flopped down on the couch  
and just sat for several minutes, enjoying the feeling of being  
home again.

"You know, Master, I can't decide if I'm too tired to eat or  
too hungry to sleep."

"Well, at least it's warm. Between the constant mud and the  
malfunctioning heaters on that ship, I felt like my feet were  
never going to be warm again," Qui-Gon ruefully replied. "Why  
don't you go ahead and take a shower first? I want to finish  
putting together the mission report before the Council starts  
calling."

"I can do that, Master, while you shower. I'm sorry, I should  
have done that on the ship coming back."

Qui-Gon smiled fondly, "You know very well neither of us had  
time, Padawan. I'm too tired to sleep right now so I'll finish  
it." He held up his hand as Obi-Wan started to protest. "Go and  
shower. You've still got mud all over you and it's getting  
rather fragrant."

"Yes, Master. At least let me get you something to eat first."

"A cup of tea would be a kindness. Thank you."

Qui-Gon moved over to the desk and punched up the incomplete  
report while his apprentice rustled up a quick meal of tea,  
bread, cheese and fruit for both of them. The Master chewed  
rather absentmindedly as he doggedly plowed through the  
creation of the rest of the mission findings.

Obi-Wan ate quickly, then went to his room and stripped off his  
dirty clothing. He grimaced as he noted the mud-encrusted state  
of his boots; that was going to be a nasty job getting his and  
Master's boots properly cleaned. Shrugging his way into a light  
sleep robe the young man headed for the fresher where he  
started the stream of water flowing as he dropped the robe.  
Entering the shower, he braced his arms against the smooth tile  
and for several minutes simply stood, letting the hot water  
soothe him as it washed the dirt and grit from his body.  
Finally stirring himself, he first lathered his hair, then  
began slowly soaping his body, letting himself enjoy the simple  
pleasure of becoming clean again. Obi-Wan had rinsed off and  
was washing his hair one more time to get the last of the grit  
out when he felt a sharp spike of emotion over the bond with  
his Master. It was smothered so quickly he couldn't quite tell  
what it was but it didn't feel good. He rapidly rinsed the last  
of the soap away, then, grabbing a couple of towels to wrap  
around himself, went out to the common room.

Qui-Gon Jinn sat motionless in front of the computer terminal,  
head buried in his hands. Obi-Wan hesitantly approached, but  
his Master did not acknowledge his presence for several  
minutes.

The older man finally raised his head, "Padawan, please get  
dressed. There is something we need to discuss."

Obi-Wan went to his room and quickly threw on clean leggings  
and tunics, then returned to the common room and sat on the  
edge of the couch. He waited silently for his Master to speak.

Qui-Gon had moved to the large chair across from the couch,  
sitting with shoulders slumped, staring down at the hands  
clenched together in front of him.

Blue eyes were raised to meet grey as the Master finally spoke.  
"Padawan, I owe you an apology. I should have spoken to you  
earlier and let you know. It's just that I didn't expect this  
to happen quite this soon." Qui-Gon stopped, a hitch in his  
breath, and seemed unable to continue.

"Please, Master, tell me what is wrong. Whatever it is, we will  
see it through together."

Qui-Gon swallowed hard before he continued. "Not this time, my  
Padawan. Shortly before we left Julstin I sent your annual  
performance report to the Council. Yoda was quite persistent  
about certain questions, and I had to tell him the truth. I put  
in my recommendation that you are ready to take your Trials. I  
meant to discuss it with you but we got diverted to help those  
flood victims. I'm sorry to have to spring this on you so  
unexpectedly, but when I was going through my messages I found  
the notification from the Council. It seems that not only do  
they agree with my recommendation, but they have several other  
candidates who are also ready. They want all of you to go  
through your Trials during the next few weeks so you will need  
to begin preparing immediately."

Obi-Wan sat stunned as the bread and cheese he had gobbled  
earlier turned into a lead weight in his gut. Trials? Now?  
There had to be a mistake. His thoughts were spinning  
frantically as a wail of distress went over the bond.

"Master, I don't feel at all ready, I'm too young, there is so  
much more to learn, I, I can't do this, not yet, not now."

Qui-Gon strode to his apprentice, put a hand on each shoulder,  
and pulled him up to his full height. "Padawan," he said in his  
sternest command voice. "You are babbling. Stop it and listen  
to me."

Obi-Wan subsided but could not totally stop the tiny tremors  
that shook his body as his Master held him firmly in place.

"Padawan, I would not have told the Council you are ready if I  
did not truly believe it. You have worked very hard for several  
years to get to this point. You finished all of the mandatory  
academic work almost a year ago, your combat skills are  
excellent, you've been on more missions than any four other  
Padawans put together. You have _earned_ the right to take  
your Trials now," he said fiercely. "I am very proud of what  
you have accomplished, my Padawan. I believe in you and I know  
that you will pass."

"I am honored that you believe in me, Master, but truly I don't  
feel ready. I'm only twenty-three, there are Padawans who are  
years older than me who haven't taken their trials yet, and I  
don't feel like I could even begin to handle missions like you  
do, Master," Obi-Wan replied shakily.

"Padawan, I know it's hard," Qui-Gon replied gently. "I didn't  
feel at all ready for my Trials either but I passed just as I  
know you will. You must not judge yourself against others,  
certainly not against me. If you are truly honest with  
yourself, the Force will tell you that you _are_ ready.  
Remember, my Padawan, taking your Trials does not mean that you  
have learned everything you can or even need to learn. When you  
become a Knight you will still continue to learn and grow for  
the rest of your life. But it is time now to move from one  
phase of your life to another. That is what the Trials are for,  
to establish that you are ready to make that move."

Obi-Wan stood quietly at last, his throat tight, taking comfort  
from the firm touch of his Master's hands on his shoulders and  
the reassurance flowing over their bond. He took a deep breath,  
then looked up into the deep blue eyes gazing down at him.  
"Master, I will take the Trials and make you proud of me. It's  
just ..." the apprentice's throat tightened even more as he  
raised one hand to Qui- Gon's chest. "I don't want to leave  
you, Master," he finally choked out as a tear slid down his  
cheek.

Qui-Gon engulfed his apprentice in the hug he had denied them  
both for so long, holding the young man tight to his chest.  
"Obi-Wan, my Obi- Wan, I know, I had hoped to have you for at  
least a little longer but I cannot be that selfish. I will miss  
you so much," he whispered as tears ran down his weathered  
cheeks. Obi-Wan returned the embrace desperately as both men  
stood in silence for several minutes.

Finally, Qui-Gon pushed Obi-Wan away and held him at arm's  
length for a moment before taking a deep breath and dropping  
his hands. "We both have duties to perform, Padawan. I will  
notify the Council that we have returned and find out when you  
have to report to the Trials Master for your preparation." He  
smiled briefly. "Right now, I want _you_ to get some rest.  
Trials or no Trials, I'm not going to let them drag you away  
the same day we get back from six weeks without a break."

Obi-Wan started to protest then realized from experience he  
wasn't going to get anywhere. Smiling in return, he said  
softly, "Yes, Master," then went to his room to try to sleep.

* * *

  


* * *

The next few weeks passed in a whirl of activity. Only two days  
after they came back to Coruscant, Obi-Wan had to report to the  
Trials Master, a dour blueskinned humanoid named Master Wivern,  
with the other four candidates. They were taken to a secluded  
part of the Temple where each was assigned a small cubicle off  
a common room; they would occupy this area until the Trials  
were completed. During that time they were not allowed to speak  
to anyone other than their fellow candidates and those running  
the Trials; in particular they were forbidden to contact their  
Masters, even over their training bond. The first four days  
they spent mostly in meditation, leaving their rooms only for  
meals, exercise and light sparring sessions, and briefings by  
the Trials Master on what would happen during the Trials. The  
next five days were an intensive series of tests, mental and  
physical, ranging from examinations of academic proficiency,  
sparring against the Sword Master, to simulated missions, and  
ending on the last day with an extensive discussion with the  
entire Council on the meaning of Jedi philosophy and why the  
candidate wanted to be a Jedi Knight. The candidates were  
allowed only a few hours of sleep and one meal a day; by the  
time he received the afternoon summons for the final Council  
discussion Obi-Wan was already very tired. Standing outside the  
door waiting to go in, Obi-Wan was grateful that he had had the  
experience of having been on so many difficult missions where  
he and his Master had arrived back on Coruscant dead tired,  
only to be summoned immediately to the Council for a  
debriefing. Thinking of his Master, Obi-Wan's throat tightened  
momentarily before he fiercely reminded himself to focus on the  
moment; he knelt to meditate and regain his center in the  
Force. He had a premonition he was going to need all the  
serenity he could gather to make it through this last session.  
Unfortunately, this premonition proved all too true; for four  
hours he stood in front of the assembled Council as they  
grilled him, skewered him, twisted his words, prodded, probed  
and generally tried to turn him inside out. Although all of the  
Council members stayed tightly shielded to prevent him from  
feeling their reactions to his answers, he could tell from past  
experience and the sharpness of their questions which of the  
Councilors were seeking to find if he had been `contaminated'  
by Qui-Gon Jinn's rebellious attitudes and heresies. It  
sometimes took all of the concentration and willpower the  
Padawan could muster to reply calmly to some of the more  
outrageous questions instead of launching into a defense of his  
Master. At long last, however, it was over and he was released  
to be escorted back to his cubicle. Joining the other  
candidates for a late supper, he found that he had been the  
last one to go before the Council and had spent the most time  
there. It was a very subdued meal; not only was everyone  
exhausted, but they all realized that their portion of the  
Trial was now over. >From this point there was nothing else  
they could do to influence the outcome and they could only wait  
for the results to be determined. The next day the candidates  
were allowed to sleep in; their time was free although they  
were still sequestered in their small part of the Temple. On  
this day each candidate's Master was summoned before the  
Council where he was allowed to review the results of the  
Trial. The Master was then given an hour to discuss the results  
with the Council and to make his final arguments on behalf of  
his Padawan. After all of the Masters had been given their  
opportunity to speak, the Council retired to make their final  
decisions.

After the evening meal, most of which had been left unconsumed  
by the nervous group of Padawans, Master Wivern gathered up his  
charges and escorted them to the Council antechamber. There the  
Padawans were reunited with their Masters to await the  
Council's pronouncement. From his position by the door, the  
Trials Master sternly reminded everyone there was to be no  
talking so most pairs contented themselves with a quick hug or  
a reassuring squeeze on the shoulder. Qui-Gon smiled at his  
Padawan as they seated themselves to wait their turn.

The first pair to be summoned were two felinoids, an old Master  
with grizzled gray fur and a young tawny female. Obi-Wan felt a  
surge of sympathy when they were called in; the Padawan had  
been having a difficult time during the Trials and had been  
very depressed all day. When they came out ten minutes later  
the Master had his arm tightly around the weeping Padawan. With  
shoulders slumped and tail dragging, she refused to look at  
anyone as they quickly left the antechamber. The temperature in  
the room seemed to drop several degrees as the Padawans  
covertly glanced at each other. The next pair to be summoned, a  
greenskinned reptilian Master and ornithoid male Padawan with a  
black crest, walked slowly toward the door, pausing to pay the  
customary respect to the Trials Master. The result was much  
different when this pair came out, however; from the Padawan's  
jaunty walk and raised crest it was evident the outcome was  
favorable. The next two pairs were summoned and released in  
turn, also with favorable results; now only one pair remained  
sitting in the antechamber.

After what seemed an eternity, the door finally opened to admit  
the last pair. By this time Obi-Wan's stomach felt as if a  
flock of overactive flickinger birds had taken permanent  
residence and he was certain the whole temple could hear his  
heart pounding. Qui-Gon smiled and patted the young man's  
shoulder. They rose and walked quietly toward the entrance,  
pausing by the Trials Master.

"Master Jinn, Padawan Kenobi, it has been my pleasure to  
serve."

The pair bowed.

"We thank you for your service, Master Wyvern," Qui-Gon replied  
on behalf of himself and his Padawan.

They advanced to the center of the Council chamber, standing  
side by side facing Master Yoda and Master Windu.

Master Windu stood to address the expectant pair.

"Master Qui-Gon Jinn, you have presented your Padawan learner  
to the Council of the Jedi Order as a candidate for the rank of  
Jedi Knight. In accordance with the Code and traditions of the  
Jedi Order, the Council has tested Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi to  
determine his fitness to serve as a Jedi Knight. Padawan Kenobi  
has undertaken the necessary Trials to demonstrate his physical  
and mental abilities; the Council has given due consideration  
to both Padawan Kenobi's record of achievement prior to his  
Trials and the results of the Trials. Before the final  
judgement of the Council is rendered, is there anyone present  
who has additional evidence or objections to be considered?"

There was a muttered grumbling from somewhere behind Obi-Wan  
which was quickly quelled by a glare from the diminutive Yoda.  
The apprentice felt a brief burst of amusement across the bond.  
// I suspect my problems with the Council cost you at least one  
vote // the Master sent apologetically. Obi-Wan was too nervous  
to trust himself to reply without doing something undignified  
like giggling.

Master Windu gazed around the room at each Council member, as  
if daring anyone else to interrupt the proceeding. Satisfied  
with the silence, he continued.

"Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi, the Council of the Jedi Order hereby  
declares that you are accepted for the rank of Jedi Knight. You  
are directed to attend the Knighting ceremony two days hence.  
Master Yoda has requested the honor of representing the Council  
at your ceremony; is this acceptable to you?"

Obi-Wan was so overwhelmed with relief that it was finally  
official that he didn't realize that everyone was waiting for  
him to respond. Finally, Qui-Gon sent him a sharp mental nudge  
and Obi-Wan collected himself. Not entirely certain what the  
question was, he decided "Yes, Master" was always an acceptable  
answer and bowed. He felt another small ripple of amusement  
over the bond.

One corner of Master Windu's mouth threatened to tug upward as  
he continued. "Very well, Padawan Kenobi. You will be notified  
tomorrow morning of your new quarters assignment. You and your  
Master will also be given an appointment with one of the soul  
healers; they will explain how the training bond will be  
dissolved and the likely aftereffects. Congratulations, Padawan  
Kenobi, Master Jinn. I look forward to your ceremony."

Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan bowed, thanked Master Windu and the  
Council, then made their escape. As soon as they were clear of  
the antechamber, Obi-Wan could feel the huge grin that  
plastered itself across his face but he no longer cared who saw  
it as they made their through the Temple to their quarters.

* * *

Three days later a dazed Knight Kenobi found himself sitting  
alone in the cramped quarters of a small Republic diplomatic  
corvette, speeding on his way to the distant planet Nurisman to  
represent the Jedi at a wedding intended to unite two key  
warring families. Much of those three days was a hazy blur of  
packing, drawing new clothes, moving, appointments, parties,  
briefings and a long stream of well-wishers at both his old and  
new quarters. Only a few events stood out with crystal clarity.  
On their last evening as Master and Padawan, Qui-Gon had forced  
him to stop bustling around, shooed everyone else away, and  
firmly marched him out to a quiet corner of an older, seldom  
used water garden. In the light of the setting sun, with the  
quiet music of a small waterfall as background music, they sat  
silently on the grass and meditated together for an hour,  
letting the Force flow through them and take them where it  
would. The next day was the Knighting ceremony itself. The  
afternoon sun pouring in through the huge windows drenched the  
Council chamber in glistening gold as Obi-Wan, resplendent in  
his formal whites, knelt before Master Yoda to receive the  
official pronouncement and blessing of the Council. Standing  
next to him, his Master then cut off the braid and presented it  
to him before joining Master Yoda as, working together, they  
gently unraveled the strands of the training bond that had  
joined Master and Padawan for so many years. This last morning,  
with only an hour before he had to catch his ship, he had found  
out that Qui-Gon was also being dispatched on a mission of his  
own. Rushing over to the departure area, he had caught his  
former Master at the foot of the boarding ramp and awkwardly  
presented to him a small velvet bag containing the newly cut  
braid. With a mumbled "I just wanted you to have this," he had  
turned to go when Qui-Gon grabbed his arm, pressed a light kiss  
to his lips, then turned and practically ran up the ramp.

And now the young man sat on a bunk in a space ship, headed out  
once more to do the Council and Republic's bidding, just as he  
had done so many times before. But this time was different; he  
was a brand new Knight of the Jedi Order on his very first  
mission. He thought he was supposed to feel proud and excited,  
but all he really felt was miserable and lonely. Both Master  
Yoda and the soul healer had explained that new Knights were  
immediately given assignments to provide an opportunity to  
establish themselves and to help them adjust to working alone  
without the training bond. Unfortunately, not all of the  
briefings, readings or advice had been able to fully prepare  
him for the incredible feeling of emptiness in his head when he  
woke up in his new quarters that morning. The place in his mind  
where the bond with his Master had been was now a blank void;  
he couldn't feel, or hear, or see _anything_ there and he  
had almost panicked when he first woke. Finally calming enough  
to meditate, he realized that the Force was still there and he  
was able to release some of his anxiety. Since then he had been  
too busy to have time to think, but now he had five days ahead  
of him, trapped on a tiny ship with not much to do but work and  
think. What he was thinking about, though, was how much he  
missed his Master.

Knight Kenobi was a conscientious young man and understood all  
too well that duty came before personal problems. Therefore he  
spent a great deal of time reviewing the mission briefings and  
all of the other available information he could find about the  
situation on Nurisman, a new member of the Republic. His first  
impression of the mission had been that it was a routine matter  
of providing a Jedi witness to yet another political wedding;  
further research showed him the situation was not as stable as  
he had thought so he would have to pay attention to ensure that  
none of the dissident elements disrupted things. He made  
careful notes on the key players, practiced the local ritual  
greetings, reviewed local customs and familiarized himself with  
the local geography.

After doing his mission work and the light exercises that were  
all that were possible in the limited space, Obi-Wan found that  
he still had a lot of time left over to meditate and think. He  
couldn't keep himself from picking at the missing bond like a  
sore tooth; there were times it almost felt like an amputated  
limb that was still trying to send him signals. The bond had  
provided a great deal of emotional support and enhanced his  
ability to join with his Master in the Force but these things  
were gone now. Obi-Wan could now see where the training bond  
was responsible for much of his attraction to Master Jinn, but  
with the bond severed, on a very fundamental level he was also  
beginning to realize that he still wanted Qui-Gon Jinn the man,  
needed him, hungered for him. He was lying on his bunk one  
night when he suddenly started laughing aloud, remembering the  
analytical Padawan who had so carefully lined up the pros and  
cons for a relationship with his Master, laying out his facts  
and feelings almost like a mathematical formula. None of that  
mattered any more, he simply _knew_ in his heart that one  
man had the power to complete his soul and he wanted that man.

Finally determining his feelings toward his former Master gave  
Obi-Wan a certain measure of peace. Unfortunately, he was no  
longer sure how the man felt toward him, and that became a  
topic that occupied much of his thoughts the rest of the trip.  
Qui-Gon had been so very careful these last few years to  
maintain a proper Master-Padawan relationship and had kept his  
feelings well-hidden. Obi-Wan was certain his Master's love had  
been sincere at the time, but he was uncertain what the  
severing of the training bond might have done to change those  
feelings. Given Qui-Gon's proud and reserved nature as well as  
his past hurts, the new Knight was sure that the Master would  
never openly pursue him, but that one fleeting kiss on  
Coruscant gave him hope that perhaps, just perhaps, the Master  
could be captured. When he got back to Coruscant, he would  
begin applying his hard-won skills to this personal mission.

* * *

Six weeks later, a triumphant if slightly battered Knight  
disembarked from a tiny red diplomatic corvette and returned to  
the new quarters he had previously occupied for just one night  
only to find a summons waiting for him. He sighed; _of  
course_ the Council wanted an immediate debriefing, he  
should have expected that. Dumping his travel pack in the  
middle of the floor, Knight Kenobi cast one wistful glance at  
the large shower before dutifully heading out.

The young Knight standing in the center of the Council chamber  
remained serene despite having to answer the same questions  
three and four times over; he had seen his Master put through  
the same drill far too many times to let it bother him. Also,  
he knew several of the Council members would be particularly  
contentious both because it was his first solo mission and  
because of who that Master was. Therefore, he made a special  
effort to stay calm and answer politely. Yes, it had started  
out as a very simple mission, no, the local powers had not  
anticipated that two of the dissident groups would join forces,  
yes, the initial security had been adequate. Why had he allowed  
the bride to be kidnapped? Two of the bride's attendants turned  
out to be members of the dissident group and turned off the  
security systems. How did he get the black eye? The bride was a  
rather feisty little thing who mistook him for a dissident when  
he sneaked into the hideout to rescue her and walloped him very  
soundly with her bag. Yes, several times. And yes, it was a  
nice wedding, yes, the bride and groom seemed to like each  
other, yes, the political situation was stable when he left,  
and so forth and so on, until even the diehards finally had  
enough and pronounced themselves satisfied. Master Yoda roused  
from his state of near somnolence and looked around the room a  
bit disgustedly. "Well done, Knight Kenobi. Wait outside you  
will."

A bit surprised, Obi-Wan bowed, then went out to the  
antechamber to wait. It was late in the afternoon and he was  
looking forward to a real shower and some food. It was almost  
twenty minutes before the doors opened and Master Yoda came  
out.

"Council business for today is finished. Speak with you I  
would, Knight Kenobi."

"Of course, Master Yoda."

They proceeded silently and slowly down the halls of the Temple  
towards Yoda's quarters, the only sound the tapping of the  
Master's stick. Once they were comfortably settled in Yoda's  
common room with cool fruit drinks, Obi-Wan waited for the  
Master to speak.

"Welcome back, young Kenobi. Happy I am that you have done so  
well on your first mission. Credit to your Master's training  
you are."

"Thank you, Master Yoda."

"New assignment the Council has for you. Master Buthawd very  
ill has become, her classes you will take over until she is  
well again."

Obi-Wan had a vague memory of a short furry humanoid with huge  
yellow eyes. "Is she still teaching languages to the older  
Initiates?"

"Languages for twelve to fourteen year olds is current task."

Obi-Wan laughed, "I thought the policy was not to throw new  
Knights directly into the fire, Master Yoda. I've seen Knights  
and Masters turn gray trying to get those kids to sit still;  
declining verbs doesn't excite them much at that age."

"Great confidence I have in my grand-Padawan," Yoda cackled.  
"Do well with them you will."

"Thank you, Master. I do have to admit it will be nice to have  
some time here at the Temple. I got bundled off so fast after  
the Knighting ceremony I still haven't had a chance to unpack  
most of my stuff yet."

"Hmmm, yes, Knighting ceremony. Cut was the training bond also  
at that time," Yoda said as he looked closely at the young man.  
"Remember I do a Padawan who was very worried about what would  
happen when cut the bond was."

"Yes, I remember him, too," Obi-Wan smiled, then turned somber.  
"Despite all that `research' and the briefings and everything,  
I would have to say I still wasn't really ready for that part  
of the experience, Master. Those first few days were the worst,  
I guess, feeling like a piece of my head and heart had been  
ripped out. I couldn't feel him or hear him any more, there was  
just nothing there. Even the Force didn't seem quite right,  
like it was no longer complete without him there, or like  
looking at a rainbow that was missing several colors." He  
paused, worrying his lower lip for a while before continuing  
slowly. "I have meditated and thought very hard and long about  
my feelings. I believe I understand now how the bond drew us  
together, but I also believe there was much more to our  
relationship that the bond had nothing to do with. Padawan  
Kenobi no longer desires his Master, but Knight Kenobi has a  
special place in his heart that he wants very much to be filled  
by a man named Qui-Gon Jinn, if that man will still have him."

Yoda rested his chin atop the hands clasped on his stick and  
gazed off into space for a while.

"Here in the Temple a Jedi there is, an exceptionally stubborn  
Jedi," the Master said softly, looking out the window. "Since  
returned from last mission three weeks ago, very quiet this  
Jedi has been. Except to perform his assigned duties and  
exercise leaves his quarters he does not. So intensely this  
Jedi fights that he has run all partners off the floor and now  
spar with him no one will. Every day he sends message to  
Council, new mission to request. Of course, he seems to realize  
not that the messages come only to me."

Yoda paused, then turned to look squarely at the young Knight.  
"Concerned I am, but speak to his old Master of what troubles  
him this stubborn Jedi will not. Tell me, Knight Kenobi, help  
this Jedi are you willing to try?"

Obi-Wan laughed and shook his head in mock dismay. "If this  
Jedi knew of this conversation, I think he would be very  
strongly tempted to kick both of us off the top of the Temple.  
Are you always this devious, Master?"

Yoda looked affronted as his ears drooped halfway. "Devious I  
am not, young man," he huffed. "Experienced, perhaps,  
practical, always. When deal with Senate and Council idiots and  
egos for hundreds of years you have, then many ways you too  
will find to get done what is needful."

"Yes, Master Yoda, I'm sure I will," the Knight replied with a  
straight face.

"Impudent youngster."

"Yes, Master, that too," Obi-Wan shot back with a cheeky grin.

Yoda smiled. "Good it is to know that not all Knights have lost  
sense of humor. But what of our special Jedi, Knight Kenobi?"

Obi-Wan stood and bowed. "I would like very much to help our  
special Jedi, Master."

"Good. Tomorrow your new duties start. Good night."

"Good night, Master. Thank you."

The Knight was almost at the door when his grand-Master softly  
called out.

"He goes to the training floor at the third hour each day."

Obi-Wan smiled without turning, nodded slightly, and continued  
out the door.

* * *

  


* * *

Knight Kenobi's first priority the next morning was to head for  
the Healer's wing. There he found Master Buthawd in a private  
room. She had contracted a severe viral infection of the lungs  
which greatly limited her ability to breathe and therefore to  
speak or exercise. The virus itself had been found and  
eradicated but the damaged lungs would take at least another  
three to four weeks to heal. Master Buthawd provided Obi-Wan  
access to her computer files that contained all of her lesson  
plans, syllabi, student records and other course materials.  
There were three classes a day in two languages; Obi-Wan was  
already quite fluent in both so they decided two days should be  
sufficient to get caught up on all the lesson plans and begin  
teaching full time. They had to go slowly because Master  
Buthawd was still quite weak, so it was almost midday by the  
time they finished reviewing the syllabus for each course and  
all of the classes for that day were already completed. Obi-Wan  
sent a message to each of the temporary instructors that he  
would be by the next day to observe the class and would take  
over the day after that.

Stopping in the dining hall for lunch, Obi-Wan still felt a bit  
self- conscious as he took his tray to an empty table. Although  
he had several friends among the ranks of the younger Knights,  
most of his friends were still Padawans and he wasn't entirely  
certain how to handle the situation. His natural friendliness  
and politeness eased any minor awkwardness, however, as several  
Padawans and a few Knights who had been offplanet during his  
ceremony joined him to offer congratulations and ask about his  
first mission. A few Masters even paused to chat briefly but  
Qui-Gon was nowhere to be seen.

Obi-Wan spent the time after lunch going over lesson plans.  
Shortly before the third hour he changed into workout clothes,  
grabbed his lightsaber and towel, then headed for the training  
floors. As he casually wandered around as if looking for an  
empty workout area he could feel his stomach churning. It had  
been several weeks since he had seen or heard from his former  
Master and he wasn't quite sure what kind of reception he would  
get. Spotting a familiar figure starting a warmup kata in one  
of the smaller side arenas, he walked over, stood just inside  
the entrance and waited patiently for some sign of recognition.  
As he watched, he noted that the movements were as fluid and  
graceful as ever but the man had evidently lost some weight  
since the day of the Knighting ceremony.

Qui-Gon finished his first kata and paused for a long moment  
without looking in the young man's direction. Instead of  
continuing into the next kata, however, he walked over to where  
Obi-Wan was standing, stopping at the maximum polite distance  
for speaking.

"Knight Kenobi, it is good to see you again," he said  
carefully, not allowing any emotion to show.

~ Ah, so that's how it's going to be. All right, you want  
formal, I can do formal right back at you. ~ Obi-Wan thought.

"Thank you, Master Jinn. It is good to see you also. I hope you  
have been well."

"Well enough."

"I just got back from my first mission yesterday or I would  
have inquired after you earlier."

"I have no doubt you acquitted yourself well," Qui-Gon replied,  
ignoring the last part of the comment.

"Well, sir, when I left the planet I _thought_ the final  
result was a success, but by the time the Council got done with  
my debriefing I was beginning to believe that I was surely the  
most miserable failure of a Knight they had ever let venture  
outside the gates of the Temple."

That drew a ghost of a smile from the older man. "The Council  
can be a bit ... difficult at times."

"And I see that you, sir, are still a master of the diplomatic  
understatement," Obi-Wan grinned.

"And what can I do for you today, Knight Kenobi?" The reserve  
was back now.

The young man bowed. "I'm afraid I've gotten a bit out of  
practice, Master Jinn, and I was wondering if you would do me  
the favor of allowing me to spar with you, sir."

Qui-Gon stood ramrod straight. While his face was pale and  
expressionless, there was a slight quickening of breath and a  
mix of emotions flashing in the blue eyes which Obi-Wan could  
not clearly translate despite the many years he had known the  
man. For a long moment he thought Qui-Gon was going to refuse  
altogether. Finally, the Master nodded, "It would be my  
privilege, Knight Kenobi. Shall we start with some warmup  
katas?"

"Thank you, Master Jinn. That would be quite acceptable."

Qui-Gon evidently quickly realized that Obi-Wan actually was a  
bit rusty after six weeks with little opportunity to practice  
so he did not push the workout to full intensity. During the  
warmup katas without weapons, the two men soon slipped into a  
steady rhythm born of long familiarity. During the sparring  
session, however, it became clear that although the physical  
movements were clean and sure, they missed the rapport they had  
enjoyed when the training bond was in place. The occasional  
awkward transition or hesitation was passed over in silence,  
however, as neither man was willing to discuss it.

At the end of the two hour session, Master and Knight completed  
the last kata, saluted each other with their lightsabers, then  
stopped to towel off and cool down for a few minutes.

"Thank you for the workout, Master Jinn. I'm afraid I was a  
little more out of practice than I realized; I apologize if the  
session was not up to your usual standards."

"You are far too modest, Knight Kenobi. You were a little rusty  
perhaps, but your skills are exceptionally sound as you well  
know. In any event, it is always good to occasionally review  
some of the more basic katas. It was a good session and I thank  
you for the work."

Seeing that Qui-Gon now seemed to be in a relatively relaxed  
mood, Obi- Wan decided to push a little despite the strict  
formality that had prevailed so far.

"Master Jinn, I will be here in the Temple for at least a few  
more weeks on a teaching assignment. My afternoons are free,  
though, and if it would not be an imposition, I was wondering  
if you would mind letting me spar with you again."

Again there was a very long pause as Qui-Gon stared sightlessly  
out over the main training floor. He turned to look at Obi-Wan,  
started to speak, hesitated for another long moment, then  
finally replied.

"Knight Kenobi, I have asked for a new mission so I'm not  
certain how much longer I will be here in the Temple." He  
hesitated again, then continued. "While I am still here,  
however, I would consider it an honor if you wish to work  
together. I normally begin at the third hour, if that is  
acceptable?"

"Thank you, Master Jinn, that would be quite acceptable. Until  
tomorrow, then?" He bowed respectfully.

"Until tomorrow," the Master nodded in reply, then left the  
arena.

* * *

Lying on the couch in his common room after the evening meal,  
Obi-Wan thought about what he had and had not accomplished that  
day. He felt like he had made a good start on his official  
duties. By tomorrow midday he expected to have seen each class  
and to have completed reviewing all of the lesson plans; after  
lunch he would have time to visit Master Buthawd again with any  
additional questions. In his `unofficial duty', however, he  
felt that his progress was rather mixed. It was a good sign  
that Qui-Gon had agreed to spar with him today and an even  
better sign that he seemed willing to continue the daily  
arrangement. The actual session had been both pleasant and  
painful. Pleasant, because the physical exertion was enjoyable  
in and of itself, especially with the companionship of his  
former Master. Painful, because it reminded him of their  
connection in the Force that they had lost when the bond was  
cut and how much he missed it. Obi-Wan was also a bit dismayed  
by the strict formality of their conversations and he had found  
it very difficult to get any sort of reading on Qui-Gon's true  
feelings. Obi-Wan shook his head and sighed; whatever was going  
on behind those blue eyes, Obi-Wan was certain the man wasn't  
going to make things easy.

During the next two weeks, Obi-Wan's life fell into a smooth  
routine. After his morning katas, meditation and breakfast in  
his room, his three classes occupied the entire morning.  
Although his misgivings about the rambunctiousness of his new  
charges proved to be not entirely unfounded, Obi-Wan found  
their energy refreshing. In this age group they were all new or  
relatively new Padawans, so he found that his stature as the  
former Padawan of the legendary Master Jinn automatically  
earned a certain bit of awe while his own situation as a new  
Knight gave him a great deal of sympathy for their own recent  
change of status. He began taking a few liberties with the  
lesson plans; while he scrupulously ensured the required topics  
were covered, he slipped in what he felt were more interesting  
readings and enjoyed coming up with classroom exercises that  
were both challenging and humorous. One day he had required  
each student to write a limerick, put them all in a hat, then  
had each student draw a limerick and try to translate it back  
into Standard. By the end of the class everyone was roaring  
with laughter, including the teacher, so of course that was the  
day Obi-Wan turned around to realize that both Master Yoda and  
Master Yaddle had been unobtrusively sitting in the back of the  
room. When Obi-Wan started to speak, Yoda waved him away, so he  
finished the class as the two Masters quietly slipped away. Oh  
well, he thought wryly as the students filed out, I guess I  
just added another black mark to poor Master Jinn's record for  
contaminating his Padawan.

Most days Obi-Wan made a point of eating lunch and dinner in  
the dining hall. He was beginning to be more comfortable with  
his place in the Jedi community. He had had a wide circle of  
friends and acquaintances among both senior Padawans and  
younger Knights before his Knighting; after a bit of initial  
awkwardness, everyone realized they were still friends and  
relaxed. If he occasionally made an effort to reach out and  
make new friends among the Knights, no one minded because he  
did not neglect his old friends. Obi-Wan soon found that those  
Knights who disdained the company of his Padawan friends tended  
to be people he didn't really like anyway.

He spent his early afternoons and most evenings either  
preparing for his classes, grading homework, or occasionally  
helping a student who was having problems with the material.  
More and more, however, the focus of his day became the workout  
with Qui-Gon. He eagerly anticipated the coming of third hour  
but was careful not to push too fast.

During the sessions Qui-Gon seemed determined to keep things on  
a formal basis. He tried very hard to treat Obi-Wan as a  
colleague with the respect due to his new stature and, although  
he occasionally slipped towards the end of a workout, generally  
took pains to ensure that he made requests and suggestions  
rather than giving orders and directions. Although Obi-Wan  
found it at first amusing but eventually just tedious, he could  
appreciate that Qui-Gon was probably having as much, if not  
more, difficulty adjusting to their new roles as he had had so  
he tried not to let it bother him.

After a few workouts (and many sore muscles), Obi-Wan had  
regained his normal level of proficiency and Qui-Gon began  
pushing the level of intensity until they were doing a three  
hour session with advanced levels of difficulty. Although he  
missed the bond with his former Master, Obi-Wan soon found that  
his own connection with the Force was just as strong as ever;  
to him sparring was almost another form of meditation as he  
felt himself become one with the Force and let his spirit out  
to sing. He didn't speak of it, but Qui-Gon too seemed to be  
happiest when their session was at its most intense and they  
were both flowing. Obi-Wan was ecstatic the day he found that  
if he opened a part of his shields with a focus on Qui-Gon  
while they were sparring, he could feel the older man's Force  
flow; while it wasn't as nice as a bond, it still made him feel  
good and gave him hope for the future.

Toward the end of the second week they had become comfortable  
enough with each other on the floor that they had advanced to a  
particularly difficult kata that Obi-Wan had never completed as  
a Padawan. They were already two hours into their session when  
they began the new kata so both men were comfortably tired.  
They successfully stepped through the first four forms at  
quarter speed, then half speed. When they attempted it at full  
speed, however, Obi-Wan stumbled in the third form twice in a  
row. The third time through he stumbled again in the same  
place, almost causing his opponent to slice off a piece of the  
Knight's nose.

"Stop," Qui-Gon roared, snapping off his own lightsaber in  
frustration. He moved over to Obi-Wan and began repositioning  
him. "Obi-Wan, your left foot is much too far out, you must  
balance it this way," nudging with his boot. "Your left  
shoulder should be _directly_ over your hip," he ordered  
as he moved around in front of Obi-Wan. Grabbing his right arm,  
he moved it to the proper angle, "Your arm must move up  
_this_ way so you can follow through properly." Qui-Gon  
suddenly froze as he realized that he was now standing almost  
belly to chest with his former Padawan, holding the man's right  
arm and left shoulder. Obi-Wan was enjoying the contact, but  
looking up into the blue eyes, he saw a flash of panic and  
confusion. They were so close Obi-Wan could almost taste the  
man's sweat and felt the spike of desire which was followed  
immediately by fear and uncertainty in his Force signature  
before the Master slammed his shields down. Qui-Gon dropped his  
arms as if he had been burned and almost stumbled over his own  
feet in his haste to back away.

"My apologies, Knight Kenobi," Qui-Gon panted. "I did not mean  
to take such liberties, please forgive me."

"No liberties were taken, Master Jinn, so no offense was  
taken," Obi- Wan replied in a puzzled tone of voice.

"It is not my place, I mean, it's not appropriate, you're a  
Knight, you deserve to be treated as such. Perhaps a different  
instructor might be better for you," Qui-Gon said. "I think we  
should end the session for today." He turned away to leave.

Obi-Wan could almost hear the unspoken thought ~ and maybe  
forever~. "Master Jinn," he said quietly. The older man turned  
around reluctantly but stood poised for flight. Obi-Wan spoke  
slowly and carefully, as if to a skittish animal.

"Master Jinn, I may be a Knight now, but two months ago I was  
still a Padawan. I had a Master whose wisdom and advice I  
greatly value, despite whatever the Council and the rest of the  
Order might think of him," Obi-Wan smiled gently. "My Master  
told me that when I became a Knight I would continue to learn  
for the rest of my life. Master Jinn, you are one of the very  
best at what you do, you know things I need to learn in order  
to be a better Jedi, and when I asked to work with you, I fully  
expected that you would use whatever teaching methods are  
needed to help me learn those things. I have never expected any  
leniency in your instruction because of our former  
relationship. Since we began these sessions, you have never  
treated me inappropriately and it has been both an honor and a  
pleasure to work with you. I do not understand, however, why  
you would feel it needful to change the teaching methods I have  
seen you use with Initiates, Padawans, Knights and even other  
Masters. If I have done something to offend you or you feel I  
am not worthy of your teaching, then it is I who should  
apologize, if for nothing else than wasting your time. Please,  
Master Jinn, tell me what I have done so I may make amends."  
All right, he thought with satisfaction, let's see him wiggle  
out of that guilt trip.

Qui-Gon looked like he had just been accused of hitting one of  
the creche babies. He opened his mouth to speak but nothing  
came out. He snapped his jaw shut as he looked around  
distractedly. Finally, "I didn't mean ... you haven't ... I  
just." He stopped to regroup, then drew a deep breath and  
started again. "Knight Kenobi, I assure you that you have not  
done anything at all to offend me. I was just trying to suggest  
that perhaps another instructor might be more effective ."

Deciding to strike hard while he had his target off-balance,  
Obi-Wan smiled sadly, "It's all right, Master Jinn." He hung  
his head and let a little tremble creep into his voice, "I  
understand, sir, if you don't want me around. You've been more  
than kind already. I ... I won't bother you any more, sir." He  
let his shoulders droop and started to turn away, hoping  
desperately he hadn't overdone it.

"No, no, I didn't say that, you can't, oh Force," Qui-Gon  
dithered as his former Padawan began to walk away, almost a  
note of desperation in his voice. "Obi-Wan, please come back."

Obi-Wan stopped, then turned around, went back to Qui-Gon and  
bowed low. "Yes, Master Jinn," he said softly, straightening  
but keeping his eyes downcast and focused on the floor.

Qui-Gon started to reach for him but instead pulled his hand  
back and drew himself up to stand as straight as he could with  
his hands clenched at his sides. "Knight Kenobi, please forget  
what I said. You are a skilled and admirable student and an  
excellent Knight. If there are things I can teach you to make  
you a better Knight, then it is my duty to ensure that I do so.  
It would be my honor and pleasure to continue as your  
instructor if you wish."

Obi-Wan looked up at Qui-Gon. "It would be my honor and  
pleasure to continue as your student. Thank you, Master Jinn."

"All right, back to work," the Master growled. "That third form  
is still atrocious."

"Yes, Master Jinn."

On the way back to his quarters after the session, Obi-Wan  
allowed himself a smile of satisfaction. Qui-Gon had run him  
around unmercifully for almost two more hours and he knew he  
would be sore later, but the thought that perhaps he was making  
progress made it worthwhile.

* * *

Early the next morning Obi-Wan found a mysterious message in  
his mail. Master Yoda directed him to gather lunch and meet him  
at noon in a back corner of one of the most obscure gardens in  
the Temple. Obi-Wan suspected the devious gnome was up to  
something again but since there was nothing he could do about  
it until the meeting, he shrugged and went on to his classes.

Stopping by the kitchen shortly before noon, Obi-Wan cajoled  
the staff into putting together a bag of sandwiches, fruit  
drinks, cheese and veggies. He made sure to snag a goodly  
supply of the lemon crisps the old Master was so fond of and  
headed out.

Obi-Wan found Master Yoda waiting for him in a nice sunny  
corner. It was very quiet as few people even remembered this  
place was here, let alone visited. Yoda insisted they eat lunch  
first. Obi-Wan provided most of the conversation, telling  
several stories of his students more outrageous exploits. Yoda,  
however, seemed to be inordinately pleased with himself, and  
occasionally cackled gleefully for no apparent reason.

As they sat munching on the lemon crisps, Obi-Wan decided he  
had finally had enough. "Master Yoda, with all due respect,  
you've been sitting there looking like a felinoid in a tub of  
fish. Might I possibly be allowed to know what you have been  
giggling about?"

"Giggle I do not, young Kenobi, unbecoming to Council member it  
is. But interesting news I have, yes."

"All right, I sort of gathered that. Are you going to tell me?"

Yoda leaned forward conspiratorially. "Visitor I had last  
night."

Obi-Wan leaned forward in turn. "Yes, Master, and ...?"

"A very tall visitor."

Obi-Wan gave an exasperated sigh, "Master Yoda!"

"Oh, all right. Getting stodgy you are, bad as Council members  
you are becoming," he grumbled, but his good humor quickly  
returned. "Yes, very tall visitor. Very agitated. Not that  
others could see, no, but know him well I do. Definitely upset  
he was. Asked him I did how sparring sessions were going and  
more upset he seemed."

Obi-Wan explained what had happened at the sparring session the  
day before.

"Ah, explain much, that would."

"What did Qui-Gon want, Master?"

"Wanted to know how much longer on Coruscant you would be. Told  
him Master Buthawd's health uncertain, weeks it could be. Then  
wanted to know why mission he was not given, go anywhere he  
offered as long as it was off Coruscant. Reminded him that  
duties here he has been assigned."

"Master Yoda, I don't quite understand what he's trying to do.  
If he keeps coming to the sparring sessions every day, why is  
he still trying to wangle a mission offplanet? I know I conned  
him pretty good yesterday, but if he _really_ wants to get  
rid of me, all he has to do is say no."

"Part of his problem that is, say no he cannot. Mention did I  
that upset he was?"

"Yes, Master. I think you did manage to get that point across,"  
Obi- Wan said dryly.

"Upset he was, shielding not so good."

"You mean you peeked inside his head? But you're his Master, he  
trusts you!"

"Know better by now he should. For his own good it was."

"Well, as long as it's already done, what did you find out?"

"Very confused the man is. Still wants you and to be with you,  
say no to your requests he cannot even if it hurts him. But,  
certain he is that you don't want him since bond was cut.  
Afraid to ask and have you say no he is. Thinks if he can get  
Council to send him away on mission problem is no longer his  
because not his fault you are separated."

"That's pretty muddy thinking, doesn't sound like Qui-Gon,"  
Obi-Wan started when it suddenly dawned on him what Yoda had  
said. "Hey, wait a minute, you said he still wants me?"

"Yes, has it bad, he does," Yoda cackled.

"He wants me, but thinks I don't I want him?"

"Very many Knighting ceremonies has Qui-Gon seen, almost always  
Padawan and Master remain `just good friends' afterward.  
Believes that is how you feel also but won't ask. Very stubborn  
and prideful is my former Padawan."

"He really wants me?" Obi-Wan asked again thoughtfully.

"Very much."

"Well then, I think we need to find a way to convince our  
special Jedi that I want him too without scaring him off."

The two conspirators looked at each other for a moment. Obi-Wan  
smiled wickedly as Yoda cackled gleefully.

"Another lemon crisp, Master?"

* * *

  


* * *

After careful consideration, they decided their best approach  
to capturing the unsuspecting Jedi Master was to continue to  
concentrate on the sparring sessions. Qui-Gon had remained  
reclusive, rarely venturing out of his quarters except for work  
and sparring, so there were few opportunities to create any  
seemingly casual encounters. Qui- Gon had kept the quarters he  
had shared with Obi-Wan but it was considered poor protocol for  
anyone other than another Master to just `drop in' on a Master  
without an invitation. He seemed willing to continue the daily  
sessions for quite some time, though, and most days actually  
seemed to enjoy them. Obi-Wan decided to work on convincing  
Qui-Gon to team up with him for the pairs lightsaber  
competition which was coming up soon.

The next opportunity came four days later. Obi-Wan successfully  
completed all twelve forms of the kata they had been working on  
for a week, actually earning a smile from the reserved Master.  
They had finished up with freestyle sparring; Obi-Wan put up a  
good fight but eventually went a little too far attempting a  
particularly acrobatic move and ended up on his back staring  
crosseyed at the green lightsaber in front of his nose.  
Laughing, he threw his hands up.

"I yield me, sir, to thy superior wizardry with thy magic  
sword, o Master."

"I didn't do anything, you silly idiot. You fell on your butt  
trying one of your fancy moves," Qui-Gon said with a straight  
face.

Obi-Wan started laughing harder, finally crawling over to sit  
up against the wall and suck in great whooping gulps of air.  
Qui-Gon smiled at him, grabbed both towels, threw the Knight's  
towel over his head and sat down against the wall near him.

Mopping his face, Obi-Wan finally got his breath back. "That  
was a good session today, Master Jinn. I enjoyed it a great  
deal."

"You did well, Knight Kenobi. That was a difficult kata you  
completed this afternoon. I am pleased with your progress."

"Thank you, Master Jinn. I have enjoyed sparring with you. It  
always seems so much easier to connect with the Force when we  
work out; when I work with you it helps me to extend my limits  
and I feel the Force even more strongly."

"Yes, that is one of the things I have enjoyed about being a  
Jedi."

They sat in companionable silence for a few moments as Obi-Wan  
judged the right moment to begin his assault.

"Master Jinn, you know the annual competition is coming up  
soon."

Qui-Gon was still leaning back against the wall with his eyes  
closed. "Yes, I suppose it is," he replied absently.

"I was wondering if you were going to compete in the open pairs  
lightsaber portion."

"Why would I do pairs any more, I don't have a partn... ,"  
Qui-Gon stopped abruptly and bit his lower lip hard.

Pretending not to notice, Obi-Wan plowed ahead. "I really like  
the pairs, it's just so wonderful working as a team, but I  
haven't found a teammate yet and I was getting worried. Then I  
started thinking about how well we used to work together and it  
just seemed like such a logical solution. I mean, oh goodness,  
I'm sorry, I'm really rattling on here, what I want to say is,  
can I be your partner for the open pairs?"

Qui-Gon looked at him a bit oddly. "Well, I don't know, I  
haven't really thought about what I might do this year."

Obi-Wan continued to plow on as if oblivious, "We could  
practice in one of the private rooms with the droids and, as  
good as you are, I'm sure it wouldn't take long at all to get  
back into the hang of it. After all, sir, you never can tell  
when you might be sent on a mission with someone else, you  
know, and it would be good for both of us."

"I suppose it wouldn't hurt to practice a little."

Obi-Wan stood up and went over to pump Qui-Gon's hand. "That's  
fantastic, Master Jinn. I really, really appreciate this, I've  
been looking forward to the competition so much, I know it'll  
just be great."

"But, I didn't ..."

Obi-Wan quickly gathered his gear and pumped Qui-Gon's hand  
again. "Don't you worry, Master Jinn, I'll take care of getting  
the room and droids and everything. I'll practice real hard,  
you'll see, it'll all work out. Thanks so much, Master."

As Obi-Wan trotted across the main floor toward the exit, he  
thought he could still hear a faint voice behind him, "but, but  
..."

* * *

Obi-Wan nervously awaited the approach of third hour the next  
day. He had reserved a private training room and two training  
droids but he wasn't at all sure that Qui-Gon was really going  
to show up. He felt like he had been a little too pushy in  
steamrolling the Master into this pairs business and was  
actually rather surprised that Qui-Gon seemed to have fallen  
for his happy little oblivious Knight routine. He just hoped  
Yoda was right about how much Qui-Gon really wanted him if they  
could ever get him to admit it.

Obi-Wan arrived at the training room early but third hour came  
and went with no sign of the normally punctual Jedi Master.  
Obi-Wan was beginning to curse anxiously but at ten minutes  
after Qui-Gon came in and apologized for being delayed. Obi-Wan  
breathed a silent but fervent sigh of relief as Qui-Gon  
deposited towel and water bottle near the door. They went  
through their warmups silently as the Master seemed rather  
preoccupied and Obi-Wan thought perhaps he was indeed having  
second thoughts about working with him. By the time they  
finished the warmups though, Qui-Gon seemed to have shaken off  
whatever was bothering him and was back in full instructor  
mode. As it had now been several months since they had last  
fought together as a duo they spent the bulk of the session  
refamiliarizing themselves with the moves and strategy involved  
in working as a pair.

The next couple of sessions they began practicing against the  
two droids but Obi-Wan quickly came to a discouraging  
realization. Individually they were both excellent swordsman  
and they had fought together for so many years that they still  
presented a formidable challenge to most other teams, but they  
lacked the full communion in the Force which had enabled them  
to operate seamlessly as a single being. He wasn't about to  
stop by any means; he was very happy he had gotten Qui-Gon to  
agree to the pairs and their workouts were still by far the  
best part of his whole day. He did miss the Force contact  
though so he began exploring the technique he had discovered in  
their earlier workouts of creating a sort of focused softening  
of his shields. He kept up his shields to everything except  
Qui-Gon's Force signature and found that he could follow his  
former Master's Force flow, not actually joining it but staying  
close enough that he could more easily anticipate Qui-Gon's  
moves. He had to be very careful not to push too hard on  
Qui-Gon's shields but after a few days practice had mastered  
the technique sufficiently to maintain this secondary focus on  
the Master even when they practiced at full speed. It wasn't  
fully satisfying but it would do for the moment.

Obi-Wan knew from long experience that once Qui-Gon committed  
himself to a project he was very thorough. After the first few  
tentative practices, their sessions became more and more  
intense over the few weeks they had left until the competition.  
By one week before the contest they were doing four hour  
workouts and added another half hour session against four  
practice droids to increase the difficulty level. The night  
before the competition they cut back to a two hour lighter  
practice and Qui-Gon finally admitted that he was reasonably  
satisfied with the level of proficiency they had achieved.

Several times during the workout that last night Qui-Gon seemed  
as if he wanted to talk to Obi-Wan about something but ended up  
diverting the conversation or not speaking at all. As they were  
cooling off, the Master came over to the Knight with a very  
studied nonchalance and hesitantly asked the young man if he  
would care to join him early in the morning for a light workout  
and meditation in preparation for the competition. Obi-Wan was  
ecstatic; this was a custom they had shared when he was a  
Padawan but he had been afraid of pushing Qui-Gon too far by  
asking for it himself. He kept his elation hidden, of course,  
appeared to consider the idea for a moment and then casually  
agreed that it seemed like a good idea. They decided to meet  
back in the private training room at first light. Walking back  
to his quarters, Obi-Wan had to work hard to maintain a sedate  
pace and serene face. If he played his cards right, this was  
going to be the perfect opportunity to pounce if there ever was  
one. Before going to bed, he sent a message to Yoda to let him  
know that zero hour of their long campaign was now at hand.

* * *

At first light the two men met back at the training room. For  
thirty minutes they did warmups and light katas, just enough to  
take the edge off and develop a light sweat. Obi-Wan had  
lightened his shields to let more of his own emotions show  
through while focusing tightly on trying to read Qui-Gon. They  
finished their workout and went to the center of the room to  
meditate.

While apparently sitting serenely facing Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan  
carefully let a small amount of distress leak out of his  
lightened shields, gradually letting it increase. This time he  
didn't have to fake anything. The anxiety was genuine; if  
Qui-Gon turned him away this morning he didn't know what he  
would do. Finally, Qui-Gon opened his eyes.

"Knight Kenobi, is something wrong?"

"I'm sorry, Master Jinn, I did not mean to disturb you. I shall  
try to do better. I don't want to ruin the competition after  
we've worked so hard to get ready."

Qui-Gon hesitated. "Is there something I can help you with,  
Knight Kenobi?"

Obi-Wan stood up and began to pace slowly, then stopped to  
kneel again in front of Qui-Gon. He looked down and worried his  
lower lip as if trying to figure out what to say. Finally he  
looked up and said softly, "Master Jinn, do you believe that  
people should keep their promises?"

"Of course. I have always very strongly believed that if it is  
at all possible you should keep your promises." He stopped  
short of saying it, but Obi-Wan could almost see an annoyed  
look on his face that said "and you should know that by now."

"That's what I have always believed too. But now, well, someone  
that I trusted a great deal has not kept a promise they made. I  
don't know what I should do and it has been bothering me a  
lot."

"Is there perhaps a reason the person is not able to keep that  
promise?"

"That's what I keep asking myself and I keep trying to find  
reasons. I thought perhaps because the promise was made a while  
ago they might have forgotten about it or maybe it was because  
I was young they thought it didn't matter." Obi-Wan hung his  
head and swallowed hard. "But I respected this person so much,  
I looked up to them for so long, it just really hurts to think  
they might have forgotten about me."

"Have you tried to talk to them?" Qui-Gon asked  
sympathetically.

"Well, I could be mistaken, but it seems they've been keeping  
me at arms length for a while now, and I'm not sure they even  
like me any more. I don't know how to talk to them anymore."

Obi-Wan could see the decision forming in Qui-Gon's eyes as he  
spoke, "Would it help if I talked to them for you?"

"That would be a kindness, Master Jinn, but it could be a bit  
difficult."

"I don't understand. Why would it be difficult?"

Obi-Wan looked straight into Qui-Gon's eyes. "Because the  
person I'm talking about is you."

The room went dead silent for several minutes as the two men  
stared into each other's eyes. Qui-Gon must have been quite  
distracted because Obi-Wan could clearly feel the confusion and  
distress radiating through the man's shielding.

Qui-Gon finally stirred. "Knight Kenobi, I must confess that I  
truly do not understand. I have never meant to hurt you and I  
truly do not know what promise you are referring to."

"Several years ago Master Qui-Gon Jinn confessed to his Padawan  
that he loved him but refused to let that Padawan love him  
back. Master Jinn told that Padawan that he could come back  
after he was Knighted and he would _welcome_ a discussion  
of their mutual feelings." Obi-Wan stopped to gather himself  
and leaned in closer to Qui-Gon. "Well, Master Jinn, I  
_am_ a Knight now, and you have been treating me like a  
distant stranger ever since I got back from my first mission.  
You keep showing up here every day like you do still care but  
then you run off and hide in your quarters so I can't see you  
outside this sparring hall. When we are in here, though, you  
hardly ever say anything except what move to work on next. I've  
had enough, Qui-Gon Jinn, and we're going to settle this here  
and now if I have to tie you down and sit on you to make you  
listen."

Obi-Wan grabbed Qui-Gon's shoulders and pushed him back flat on  
the floor. He leaned over him and looked down into the Master's  
eyes as he continued, "Qui-Gon Jinn, you are the most  
exasperating, cantankerous, stubborn man it has ever been my  
misfortune to meet. But you are also the kindest and most  
compassionate man I have ever met and I love you." Obi-Wan bent  
over and firmly kissed the totally stunned Master.

Qui-Gon roused himself and tried to twist away from the  
Knight's grasp. Obi-Wan grabbed his hands and pinned them at  
his sides, then sat down hard on Qui-Gon's stomach, causing a  
strangled "oof" to escape.

"Oh no you don't," he growled. "We're going to finish this one  
way or another right now, old man."

"Kenobi ... Obi-Wan, this can't be, you don't know what you're  
saying, it just can't happen ..." Qui-Gon started to ramble.

"Qui-Gon, shut up, you're not making any sense," the Knight  
barked as he added a Force shove to make sure the big Jedi  
stayed down. "Now, let's take this one piece at a time, all  
right?"

The now subdued man nodded.

"First, do _you_ still want _me_? Do you still love  
me? Because if you don't, then there's not much point in  
continuing this conversation."

Qui-Gon nodded miserably. "Yes, Obi-Wan Kenobi. I, I still want  
you. I love you with all of my heart."

"Good. Now tell me why you think it's so impossible that I  
could love you."

"Obi-Wan, I know you believed that you cared for me; I even let  
myself hope for a while that it might be true. But you had  
those feelings when you were a Padawan. I've seen hundreds of  
Knightings in my life, and for only a handful of those did that  
kind of love between Master and Padawan survive the cutting of  
the training bond. How could I believe that it would be any  
different for you? Especially when I look at you and I see such  
a young and beautiful Knight, a good man, popular and able, a  
Knight with his whole life before him who could have anyone he  
wanted. Who in their right mind could even imagine that such a  
beautiful young man would have any desire for a foolish old man  
like me?"

"Well, maybe I'm not in my right mind," Obi-Wan smiled as he  
saw a flicker of hope in the Master's eyes which was quickly  
dashed when he continued. "But you were right that a Padawan's  
feelings change when the bond is cut."

Obi-Wan paused for a moment. "Padawan Kenobi was devoted to  
Master Jinn. He loved the man who had cared for him, taught  
him, showed him the beauty of the Light in the Force, made him  
into the man he became. When the training bond was cut, Padawan  
Kenobi was devastated; the place where those feelings had lived  
had been torn out and it seemed they were gone forever. But  
Knight Kenobi took a long hard look at what was still there,  
and what he saw were the feelings for a good and worthy man, a  
man who had his flaws but also tremendous strength and courage,  
a man who shone with the beauty of the Force. He remembered the  
joy and the strength of their union in the Force and Knight  
Kenobi saw the man who could complete his soul."

Obi-Wan released the Master's hands and rolled off him to lie  
stretched out on his side next to him. He gently took Qui-Gon's  
hand and moved it to his own face. "I know it's been so very  
hard for you, you kept your feelings behind a wall for such a  
long time so I could become a Knight, but it's over and I'm  
here for you now. I love you, Qui-Gon Jinn." Obi-Wan closed his  
eyes, laid his head on the Master's chest and dropped his  
shields, pouring out all of his love in a wave of longing and  
desire.

For a long moment there was only silence, then a gasp. Obi-Wan  
felt Qui-Gon loosening his shields, then was overwhelmed by the  
wave of love, desire and pain that flooded him. Qui-Gon pulled  
the younger man up so they were both on their knees, kissed him  
hard on the mouth, then held him in a tight embrace for several  
minutes as he sobbed.

Eventually both men pulled back from the embrace. Tears still  
running down his face, Qui-Gon reached up to touch Obi-Wan's  
face gently. "I can't believe it's true, I've wanted you for so  
long."

"Believe, my love. Your waiting is over." Obi-Wan softly kissed  
the Master's lips as he gently sent a Force tendril.

// Qui-Gon, my love //

Another gasp. // Obi-Wan? //

// Yes, my love //

// Obi-Wan! //

As the young Knight pressed his kiss, demanding and receiving  
entrance to his lover's mouth, swirling currents of Force  
coalesced around them in a joyous, scintillating fountain. The  
two lovers were joined together in a warm blanket of  
fulfillment.

Finally forced to break their kiss to come up for the air, the  
two men held each other in a tight embrace.

// Obi-Wan, if this is a dream, please don't ever wake me up //

// It's even better than a dream because it's real //

Suddenly they were interrupted by an insistent knocking on the  
door. They broke their embrace just before a Knight stuck his  
head through the door. "Hey, come on, you guys were supposed to  
be out of there five minutes ago - oh, I'm sorry, Master Jinn,  
I didn't realize..."

Qui-Gon held up his hand. "It's all right, we've finished what  
we needed to do in here." He smiled at Obi-Wan. "We were just  
leaving."

* * *

  


* * *

The two Jedi walking through the Temple halls presented a  
serene appearance to the jostling throngs preparing for the  
day's special activities.

// We need to get out of here // Qui-Gon nodded at a passing  
acquaintance.

// Gardens? //

// Now //

Passing swiftly through back hallways and down seldom used  
stairways the two men soon emerged from a side door into the  
early morning light. Qui-Gon led the way past fountains, flower  
beds and statues to a quiet grassy corner hidden behind the  
friendly concealment of a row of overgrown hedges.

Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan stood facing each other, neither quite sure  
exactly how to proceed. Finally, Obi-Wan smiled and held out  
his hand. Qui- Gon slowly reached out to gently grasp the hand,  
holding it as if it were made of fragile glass.

"Obi-Wan, please forgive me, it's just that this is all so  
sudden and very overwhelming. I'm not sure whether to laugh or  
cry or just fall down on my knees to thank the Force."

"It's all right. To be honest, I'm feeling kind of shaky  
myself. When I told you I loved you I wasn't sure if you were  
going to hit me or kiss me back."

"Actually, I think my brain went into a total state of denial.  
I had convinced myself that was something that would never  
happen. When you were my Padawan I kept my love locked up, but  
I could feel you through the bond, I could see that you cared  
for me. I could at least unlock my heart sometimes to take that  
love out, hold it, and dream of what might be, no matter how  
much it hurt each time I put it away and turned the key. That  
day you were Knighted and I couldn't feel you any more ..."  
Qui-Gon's voice choked.

Obi-Wan moved closer and held his lover in a gentle embrace,  
one hand running slowly through the long hair.

"It's all right. I remember all too well that day when the  
training bond was dissolved. There was one part of me that was  
happy that I had finally achieved what we had worked so hard  
for. But when the bond was cut I felt like part of me had been  
cut out with it. I couldn't feel you and I was so despondent  
and mixed up, I didn't know what to do. It took me a while to  
sort out the chaos inside and find out that what was left was  
truly love for you."

"I'm glad you came back for me. I have to admit that where you  
are concerned, my courage, and probably whatever sense and  
logic I ever had, seems to have failed me since your Knighting.  
That first day you came to the training floor, I very nearly  
turned around and ran away. I didn't think I would be able to  
bear being so near to you and yet so far from your heart."

"Why did you stay?"

"I'm not really sure. I remembered that sparring had always  
been one of our special joys. And, I think, perhaps I was  
desperate enough to grab for any piece of you I could have."  
Qui-Gon grinned tentatively, "or perhaps I just have a major  
masochistic streak that I hope the soul healers never find out  
about."

Obi-Wan whapped his shoulder. "You certainly didn't make things  
easy, you know."

Qui-Gon tightened the embrace. "I'm sorry for that. In my head,  
I had convinced myself you couldn't possibly love me, but there  
was a small piece of my heart that persisted in believing in  
the impossible. I knew that if I ever asked and you said no,  
what little was left of my heart would be broken. I'm so glad  
you persisted, though."

// I learned patience and stubbornness from a Master //

Qui-Gon bent down for a gentle kiss. // And I have much to  
learn from you, my love //

Obi-Wan leaned back, then reached up to caress Qui-Gon's cheek.

"The pairs competition starts soon. We should get ready."

"I think I would rather stay here with you," Qui-Gon murmured  
as he reached to capture the hand on his cheek, then gently  
kissed the palm.

"Master Jinn, today we have a title to claim. Tonight, I  
promise that you will claim your reward for waiting for me all  
those years."

"It was a very, very long time to wait, my Obi-Wan," the Master  
slyly drawled.

// Then I shall have to make sure it is a very, very large  
reward // Obi-Wan grinned wickedly as he stepped back out of  
reach. // You owe me for these last couple of months, Qui-Gon  
//

// ? //

// You have no idea how hard it was to spar with you, knowing  
what we had before and not being able to have it again //

// I understand. Being one with you in the Force when we used  
to spar was one of the main things that made my life bearable  
//

// Let us take the best of our old life and make it the start  
of our new one. Join with me today, let us be one again //

// Forever, my love //

Master and Knight made their way back to the main arena just as  
the first matches in the junior singles lightsaber competition  
were finishing. Waiting quietly for their first match to begin,  
the two men were carefully rebuilding the rapport they had  
enjoyed before Obi-Wan's Knighting. Wordlessly they began  
crafting layers of Force energy into a seamless link between  
them. In their first match the link was still tentative, a  
nascent morning bloom still seeking the first light, but the  
two young Knights they faced stood no chance against the  
distinguished swordsmen. As each match progressed, the link  
grew firmer, fed by the Force energy flowing from each man. The  
pair began to mesh into a seamless entity and the brilliance of  
their teamwork began drawing more and more attention; by late  
afternoon the arena was filled in anticipation of the final  
match.

In one of the small practice rooms near the main floor, several  
of the remaining contestants for upcoming matches waited.  
Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan occupied the far corner, sitting shoulder  
to shoulder against the wall, eyes closed and bodies relaxed.  
Obi-Wan was almost humming in contentment, enjoying the solid  
warmth of the man next to him. The link had blossomed like a  
red rose in the heat of the midday sun, spinning itself into a  
shining web encompassing two hearts which beat as one.

Hearing the call for their match, the two men rose and left for  
the center of the main arena. As the contestants were  
announced, they surveyed their opponents, a formidable duo of  
Masters who had nearly beaten them in a competition three years  
earlier. Obi-Wan felt the anticipation rapidly building as the  
introductions were completed and the signal to begin was given.  
As the lightsabers ignited, he felt as if he could see the bond  
begin to glow, a lightly shimmering incandescence surrounding  
both men. Moving into their first defensive position, Obi-Wan  
could feel himself merging with his Master. He could feel  
Qui-Gon's heart beating as his own, breathing with his lungs,  
seeing with his eyes. The Force surged around them, and Obi-Wan  
suddenly knew that this was _right_ as nothing else had  
ever felt so right before. He grinned fiercely and let himself  
go completely as he felt Qui-Gon join him in the single being  
they had now become.

The match proved to be lengthy and challenging. For a long  
while both pairs were content to maintain a solid defensive  
stance as they cautiously probed and parried. The audience was  
awed by the elegance and exactitude of the deadly ballet that  
moved fluidly across the arena. The team of Jinn and Kenobi  
gained the interior position, fighting back to back as their  
flashing sabers whirled so fast they created a sphere of green  
and blue light around the two Jedi. Their opponents danced  
around the perimeter, time after time trying in vain to pierce  
the Force-enhanced protective shroud. Slowly wearing their  
opponents down, Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan seemed tireless, never  
wavering in their seamless precision as they gradually began to  
move onto the offensive and drive their foes across the floor.  
Pursuing relentlessly, they waited patiently for the right  
opening. Finally sensing that their opponents were tiring,  
Obi-Wan engaged one man in a defensive battle as Qui-Gon  
shifted to a fierce offensive attack on the second. Qui-Gon  
drove his foe backward toward Obi-Wan's opponent until they  
were only a few yards apart. Suddenly, Qui-Gon executed a  
complex aerial flip over his man while Obi-Wan simultaneously  
dove and rolled toward the man Qui-Gon had just left. When the  
blur of movement was completed, Obi-Wan had emerged inside the  
guard of one Master with saber at the man's throat while  
Qui-Gon was behind the other Master with his saber poised  
across the side of the man's neck. Stunned silence prevailed  
for a moment, then the entire arena erupted in thunderous  
applause as the two Masters graciously yielded.

The applause and cheers continued as both teams moved back to  
the center of the arena and faced each other. Raising their  
sabers, the teams saluted each other and acknowledged the  
well-fought effort on both sides. Extinguishing their weapons,  
Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan then turned to each other. With a wicked  
smile, Qui-Gon pounced on his former apprentice, engulfed him  
in a tight embrace and kissed him hard.

// Master, my reputation ... //

// ... has just been greatly enhanced //

A second stunned sudden silence was followed by more applause  
and cheers as Qui-Gon finally broke the long kiss, then put his  
arm around Obi-Wan's shoulders as they left the floor. Obi-Wan  
was still riding the adrenaline and Force rush from their match  
as they left and felt as if he was floating. He could not  
remember ever feeling this wonderful and the future looked even  
brighter. He put his arm around the Master's waist and leaned  
into him as they headed down the hallway, neither caring who  
saw them.

// Your place or mine, o mighty Master?//

// Mine, of course //

// Why 'of course' ? //

// Bigger bed, my dear Knight //

Obi-Wan laughed and felt his heart soaring. Suddenly they were  
interrupted by a raspy voice calling out behind them.

"Master Jinn, Knight Kenobi."

They turned and waited politely as they saw Master Yoda slowly  
making his way toward them. He was followed at a slight  
distance by another small but furry Master.

Obi-Wan recognized the second visitor. "Master Buthawd! I  
didn't know you were back."

"Returned to us today, she did. Speak to you two, I wish," Yoda  
said.

Both men bowed and replied in unison, "Yes, Master."

"Watched you today, I did. Most impressive, yes."

"Thank you, Master Yoda," Qui-Gon said.

Yoda looked the tall Master up and down. "Last match very good,  
indeed, especially display at end," he cackled as he poked  
Qui-Gon in the shins with his stick. "Very public display,  
hmmm."

Qui-Gon blushed as he muttered, "Yes, Master."

"Explain yourself, you will. What are you doing with my grand  
Padawan?" Yoda demanded as he got in another whack on the  
shins.

Qui-Gon winced but stood his ground as one long arm reached out  
to gather a grinning Knight into his side. "Obi-Wan and I love  
each other," he said defiantly.

"Love, hmmm ... what say you, Knight Kenobi?"

Obi-Wan kept his shields up as he paused for a long moment.  
"Yeah, I guess so," he finally replied with a serious face.

"Huh! What do you mean, you _guess_ so, what's that  
supposed to mean, you said ..." Qui-Gon spluttered.

Yoda and Obi-Wan were laughing as the Knight reached down to  
shake hands with the old Master.

For a moment Qui-Gon stared at the two as if they had suddenly  
sprouted horns and tails. Understanding quickly dawned,  
however. "Why, you miserable, devious, little green troll," he  
wagged a finger in Yoda's face, "you've been conspiring again,  
haven't you, you sorry little - OOWWW!"

Qui-Gon's rant was interrupted by a Force-enhanced thwack  
across one already bruised shin. "Tssk, tsskk, such language,  
my Padawan. Your own fault, it was. Much too stubborn for your  
own good."

Obi-Wan grabbed his former Master and kissed him to prevent  
another outburst. Breaking the kiss, he said softly "We both  
care for you a great deal, Qui-Gon. After I came back to  
Coruscant, Master Yoda helped me to sort things out. You  
_can_ be pretty stubborn, you know."

Somewhat mollified, Qui-Gon stopped glaring at Yoda long enough  
for a disgruntled "hmmph".

"Proposal I have for you Knight Kenobi," said Yoda.

"Yes, Master?" Obi-Wan lifted an eyebrow.

"Master Buthawd an excellent recovery of health has had. If  
turn over class records now you can, take back classes she will  
starting tomorrow."

Although it was hard to see any expression through the dense  
fur on the short Master's face, Obi-Wan almost swore he could  
detect a twinkle in her eye and wondered for a moment just how  
far Yoda's conniving extended. Torn between wanting Qui-Gon now  
and the prospect of waiting now in order to have more time  
tomorrow, he turned to his lover and said hesitantly, "It would  
only take a couple of hours, if you wouldn't mind too much ...  
"

Qui-Gon looked acidly at the whole group for a moment as if  
suspecting yet another plot was about to be hatched against  
him, then finally relented and embraced the Knight. "It's all  
right, Obi-Wan, this will give us more time to be together  
later. I'll go back to my quarters, get cleaned up and arrange  
to have dinner sent up. Will seventh hour be all right?"

"That would be wonderful. Thank you." After giving his lover a  
quick kiss, Obi-Wan headed for his own quarters with Master  
Buthawd in tow while Qui-Gon and Yoda talked.

* * *

  


* * *

Obi-Wan's class records were well organized so he was able to  
complete the transition with relative ease. They went over each  
student's status as well as the progress of the class as a  
whole. Obi-Wan was pleasantly surprised to find that Master  
Buthawd was quite interested in some of the new exercises he  
had introduced. There was a lot of material to go over and the  
time passed quickly but they were able to finish enough by half  
past sixth hour that the Master pronounced herself satisfied  
that she could take over in the morning and promised to seek  
him out later if she had more questions. She complimented Obi-  
Wan on the excellent progress the classes had made and as she  
was leaving also invited him to stop in and help if he had some  
free time. Obi-Wan thanked her, then retreated to the fresher  
for a hot shower.

Walking down the hallway, Obi-Wan could feel the pull of the  
new bond growing ever stronger. Finally standing in front of  
the familiar door just before seventh hour, he felt an odd  
sense of disassociation. It was almost as if the Padawan who  
had lived in these quarters for so many years had died and been  
reborn as a new man, a Jedi Knight now returning to rekindle  
the ashes of the fire which had birthed him. Stepping inside,  
he gazed slowly around, noting absently that nothing seemed to  
have changed since the last time he had been in these rooms.  
His eyes lingered on the closed door to the Padawan room until  
Qui-Gon emerged from the kitchen and claimed his full  
attention.

Barefoot, hair tied back in a single tail, and dressed in  
casual light gray leggings and a cobalt blue tunic, the Master  
was a delicious sight as he strode forward to wrap his former  
apprentice in a warm hug. After a quick kiss, Qui-Gon went back  
to finish bringing out the rest of the meal as he waved Obi-Wan  
in the direction of the table. The Knight decided it would be  
more comfortable with his boots off and left them near the  
front door before sitting down opposite Qui-Gon at their small  
table.

The meal itself passed quietly enough. The Temple kitchen had  
sent up some of its better offerings so they didn't have to  
worry about Qui- Gon's rather suspect cooking and the Master  
had brought out a particularly fine bottle of Sylvoran wine he  
had received as a gift a few years back. Both men turned out to  
be very hungry, which was perhaps not so startling given the  
amount of energy they had expended that day. They spoke little  
until after their initial hunger was satisfied and then talked  
desultorily of various inconsequential topics as they worked  
their way through the rest of the meal. Obi-Wan was somehow not  
surprised when Qui-Gon mentioned that Yoda had reassigned his  
duties so Qui-Gon had the next few days free. By the time they  
reached the fruit pastries which completed the repast, though,  
Obi-Wan could feel the anticipation building and the two men  
made quick work of cleaning up.

They moved to the couch in the common room and sat down next to  
each other. There was an awkward silence for a moment until  
Qui-Gon shyly gathered in one of Obi-Wan's hands and slowly  
brought it to his mouth for a kiss. Gently stroking the palm  
with one thumb, he looked at Obi- Wan.

"You know, I can see you in front of me, I can touch you, I can  
hear you, and I feel the bond between us, but somehow I'm still  
having trouble believing you're really here."

Obi-Wan's free hand reached up to caress the older man's face,  
softly tracing the edge of the beard. "It was an awfully long  
time, wasn't it?"

"Yes, all those years when I wanted you so much. I could see  
you every day but I knew if I ever let go, touched you, I might  
risk losing you. There were times I felt like a man dying of  
thirst and you were a cool stream of water, always in front of  
me but always just out of reach." He smiled ruefully, "there  
were times I meditated so much I wasn't sure my knees were  
going to survive until you were Knighted." Still holding one  
hand, he reached up to carefully run the other through  
Obi-Wan's hair.

"I have to admit I never really understood all of your  
concerns, especially about what would happen after our training  
bond was dissolved. But I understand now why most relationships  
never survive after the bond is cut and I'm just beginning to  
appreciate how much strength it took to hold out all that  
time." He leaned over to graze his lips softly against  
Qui-Gon's lips. "I just wish you could have trusted me more  
when I got back." Another gentle touch of lips.

"I'm sorry. I was too afraid to risk a refusal." Another kiss.  
"I promise I'll make it up to you." Warm lips touching, hot  
tongue gently asking permission.

Tongues touching and eagerly exploring, Obi-Wan raised both  
hands to Qui-Gon's head, one hand carefully loosing the hair  
tie so he could run his hands through the long brown and silver  
mass.

They held the kiss until the need for air finally forced them  
apart. Qui-Gon softly traced the contours of his lover's face,  
fingertips just barely touching the skin, while Obi-Wan  
continued to run his hands through the Master's fine silky  
hair.

"mmmm ... I've always wanted to do that ... such beautiful hair  
..." Obi-Wan murmured.

Qui-Gon moved closer and began raining gentle kisses across his  
lover's face, starting at his forehead, across his eyes, down  
his cheeks, on his chin, back up to his nose and finishing with  
another deep kiss on the welcoming lips. Obi-Wan ran one hand  
through his lover's hair as the other traced the edge of one  
ear and then began to move in slow circles on Qui-Gon's back,  
fingers gliding smoothly over the fine fabric. For several more  
minutes they kissed and petted each other. Qui-Gon moved to  
nibble at an ear and began working his way down Obi- Wan's  
neck, whiffling softly under the neck of the tunic, pushing the  
fabric down off his shoulders until it would go no further. He  
kissed and nibbled at the base of the neck as he began very  
slowly unfastening Obi-Wan's tunic. Meanwhile, the young Knight  
had loosened the Master's tunic and was lightly massaging his  
back under the shirt in soothing circles.

Qui-Gon pulled back to get to the last fastener on Obi-Wan's  
tunic and remove it altogether. This gave Obi-Wan room to grab  
the bottom of the Master's tunic and pull it up and over his  
head. They joined again in a lingering kiss, tongues dancing,  
the first skin to skin contact sending an electric jolt through  
both men, causing the bond to begin to gently throb. Hands  
roamed hungrily across the newly exposed expanse of skin. They  
broke slowly from the kiss as Qui-Gon nibbled his partner's  
lower lip. Qui-Gon leaned his head back as Obi-Wan moved down  
to the older man's neck, nibbling and kissing along the neck  
and shoulder, then pausing to suck hard at the vein pulsing at  
the base of the neck. Kissing the red mark left behind he began  
to move even lower, licking and kissing the skin, paying  
particular attention to each scar he encountered, memorials to  
his Master's long service to the Jedi. Qui-Gon's hands  
continued to roam, skimming ghostlike across Obi's back and  
arms, then leaving a tingling and tickling feeling down his  
ribs and across his belly.

Obi-Wan's progress continued and he began to suck on one  
nipple, grazing it with his teeth, then kissing and sucking it  
again. His partner's large hands found the two smaller nipples  
and quickly brought them to attention; the jolt sent a surge of  
electricity to Obi-Wan's rapidly hardening cock. He bit down on  
the nipple in his mouth, causing a gasp from his lover, then  
quickly licked the pain away before moving over to minister to  
the other nipple. Two sets of hands continued to explore slowly  
as if seeking to touch every possible inch of skin. As Obi-Wan  
finished his attentions to the now hard nipple, he felt himself  
drawn back up for an intense kiss. Qui-Gon embraced him hard  
and forced his tongue deep, savoring the unique flavor of his  
lover. As the bond continued to increase in intensity, the two  
men began to feel each other's emotions and reactions just as  
they had during the sparring earlier that day. By now Obi-Wan's  
cock was uncomfortably tight even in the loose leggings; he  
could both see and feel that Qui-Gon was in a similar state. As  
they withdrew from another long kiss, on impulse he reached for  
one of Qui-Gon's hands and moved it to press down on his own  
cock through the leggings.

Qui-Gon's reaction startled and shocked his new lover. Up to  
this point he had been as eager and passionate as Obi-Wan, but  
as soon as his hand started to squeeze the younger man's hard  
cock through the fabric, he froze. Obi-Wan could feel a spike  
of distress through the bond, then Qui-Gon seemed to withdraw  
emotionally just as he pulled back physically to move away on  
the couch. He sat very still, breathing heavily, arms pulled up  
to hug himself in a defensive slump, head down.

"Qui-Gon, what's wrong?" Obi-Wan asked anxiously.

Making a conscious effort to relax, Qui-Gon let his arms drop  
and looked up. "I ... I'm sorry, Obi-Wan," he mumbled. "I guess  
I wasn't quite ready for that ... "

"I don't understand what's wrong. I thought you were all right  
with what we're doing, it felt good over the bond. If we're  
going too fast or I've done something wrong ... "

"No, no, it's me," Qui-Gon interrupted.

"Qui-Gon, I thought you had done this before. You're surely not  
a virgin at your age, are you?"

"Of course not," he said with wounded dignity, sitting up  
straight.

Remembering that Yoda had mentioned only Qui-Gon's female  
lover, Obi- Wan had a hunch. "You've never been with a man,  
though, have you?" he said very softly.

Qui-Gon blushed, swallowed, then sighed. "Well, yes, sort of.  
It's kind of a long story." Qui-Gon shifted uncomfortably and  
the blush deepened. "And it's, ... well, ... it's just ...  
there were some unexpected problems."

"It's all right. You don't have to talk about it if it's going  
to bother you."

"No, I don't want there to be any secrets between us. I love  
you, and I want very much to make love to you. You need to know  
about it so you understand ..."

Obi-Wan reached out to hold Qui-Gon's hand, silently sending  
love and reassurance over their bond.

Qui-Gon smiled gratefully, then rubbed his nose with a  
forefinger and sighed again before continuing. "When I was a  
Padawan, I was fairly active sexually and did the usual  
experimenting. I first made love with a woman on my 18th  
birthday ... a few months after that I had this friend, a  
rather good looking young male Padawan. We had done a lot of  
kissing and groping and finally decided we were going to, you  
know, do it. We wanted to make this a special occasion because  
it was the first time with a man for both of us. We were on a  
break between classes and were both able to get permission from  
our Masters to leave the Temple for a late night. We decided to  
really make a night of it, a nice dinner out, a couple of clubs  
and then find a hotel so we could have some privacy.  
Unfortunately we rather overdid things by spending too much and  
drinking too much. By the time we were ready to leave the last  
club, we didn't have a whole lot of money left for a nice place  
to stay. Not being entirely sober and by that time getting  
anxious to get to the main event, so to speak, we picked a  
place at random on one of the lower levels. We should have  
known better, but it looked reasonably clean, we weren't really  
thinking straight, and, in any event, we figured we could take  
care of ourselves. We went up to our room and after a little  
preliminary kissing and petting, we got naked and started to  
explore each other's bodies."

Qui-Gon paused again to close his eyes and take a couple of  
deep breaths. "We hadn't gotten very far when the door burst  
open and a group of men came rushing in. We were both startled  
enough that we didn't react very fast and they must have  
knocked both of us with some kind of blackjack. The next thing  
I remember was waking up with a nasty headache; I was still  
naked but tied up and my friend was still unconscious and was  
bleeding from a head cut. There were ten of them, rough  
looking, mostly humanoid, and they seemed to be arguing. As  
best as I could determine, they had been looking for someone  
who had ripped them off in some kind of smuggling deal, had a  
tipoff the person was in this hotel, and had found us instead.  
I was hoping they'd just leave us alone and go look for  
whomever it was they really wanted, but luck was not with us  
that night. One of them found our lightsabers, came over and  
looked at us, then realized they had caught two Jedi Padawans.  
He called everyone over and they seemed to find it very amusing  
to have so easily captured two Jedi, even if we were just  
Padawans. Most of them were still angry about missing their  
real prey, but they obviously didn't think much of Jedi either,  
so they decided to have some `fun' with us instead."

Qui-Gon squeezed Obi-Wan's hand and worried his lower lip a bit  
before continuing in a quiet voice. "By this time my friend was  
conscious but still pretty groggy. We were both scared and  
couldn't figure out how to get out of there. I was trying to  
call my Master over our bond but I was having a hard time  
focusing because my head hurt so badly and I couldn't tell if I  
was getting through to him. They started to rough us up but one  
of them figured out that since we were both already naked we  
must have been having sex and he convinced the others it would  
be `amusing' to force us to do it in front of them. With a  
blaster at my head and a knife at my throat, there wasn't a  
whole lot of choice. They untied us and forced us to kiss and  
fondle each other but my friend had a bad concussion and  
couldn't achieve an erection even after they threatened him and  
cut him pretty badly. I was in better shape, at least I had an  
erection, so they forced me to have anal sex with him,  
threatened to kill him if I didn't go through with it. Well, I  
managed to do enough to satisfy them even though I was nauseous  
and threw up as soon as it was over. By this time some of them  
had decided they had had enough and wanted to get out of there  
and get back to looking for the ripoff artist. I think a couple  
of them wanted to stay and have a go at us themselves but  
fortunately they must have gotten outvoted. One of them did cut  
off my friend's braid as some kind of souvenir, I suppose, and  
they tied us up again. I must have been hit on the head again  
because the next thing I remember is waking up in the Healer's  
ward. Master Yoda told me later he had been able to trace us  
through our bond but they never did find the people who hurt  
us."

"My friend had the worst of the affair. I got out of the  
Healer's ward in three days but he ended up staying two weeks.  
Afterward we both had to go through counseling for a while but  
for a long time sex just didn't seem very important to me any  
more and I was very uncomfortable with getting physically close  
to anyone, especially another man." Looking up at Obi-Wan,  
Qui-Gon gave him a half-smile. "I did eventually meet a very  
wonderful woman, and we were very close until she was killed on  
a mission. But I never met any men that I liked enough to want  
to try to get over this block that had developed in my head."

"So that's why you always had so much trouble with all the  
Talks when I was young?"

"Yes, I had the same problem with both of my male apprentices;  
I was still uncomfortable even discussing intimate subjects.  
When I finally fell in love with you, though, I wanted you so  
very much, and it had been so long, I hoped that it wouldn't be  
a problem any more. I guess I thought that if I could fantasize  
about doing it with you and could masturbate while I thought  
about you, I should be able to really do those things with you  
if I ever got the opportunity " He snorted in self-deprecation.  
"Evidently I thought wrong, judging by my reaction tonight when  
I touched your cock, even through your leggings. I felt like I  
was suddenly having a flashback and I just couldn't go through  
with it any more."

Obi-Wan opened his arms and invited his lover in as he  
continued to send warmth and love over their bond. "Qui-Gon, I  
had no idea. It's all right, we'll work it out."

"I feel so stupid, I know it's just in my head and I could  
have, should have, done something about it before now," the  
Master whispered as he hugged the young Knight. "I'm sorry, I  
wanted this to be so good for you, it's not turning out the way  
I dreamed of for such a long time..."

"It's all right," Obi-Wan murmured. "We can stop now if you  
want, it's all right."

"No, I really do want to make love to you, now, tonight, every  
night, forever. I just need to get past this nonsense in my  
head."

"We can do this together, my love. Let me help you."

Qui-Gon pulled back from the embrace and looked humbly at the  
young man. "I would like that very much. What are we going to  
do?"

"We're going to go to your bedroom so we have more room to get  
comfortable and we are going to start over. We're only going to  
go as fast as you are comfortable with, and the leggings stay  
on until you're sure you're ready. Can you do that for me?"

Qui-Gon nodded soberly at his lover. Obi-Wan could still feel  
the older man's embarrassment and discomfort over the bond, but  
he could also sense that he wanted this very badly and was  
willing to work hard at it. They stood up and Obi-Wan led the  
way into the main bedroom.

Stretched out next to each other on the oversized bed, Obi-Wan  
had Qui- Gon lie face down so he could begin by running his  
hands through the Master's hair and massaging his neck,  
shoulders and upper back until he felt the initial tension  
begin to dissolve. When Qui-Gon was relaxed enough to turn over  
and seek him out, they began to kiss again, slow, lingering  
kisses, deeper and deeper as they began to get comfortable with  
each other once more. Hands began to roam with more assurance,  
moving from face to neck, down arms and sides and across  
bellies. For a long time they simply continued to kiss and pet  
until Obi-Wan was satisfied with the deepening hum of  
contentment he could feel building across their bond. When  
Qui-Gon seized one of his hands and began to kiss and nibble on  
his fingers, Obi-Wan began kissing and licking his way down the  
big man's neck, pausing once more to suck deeply where the  
pulsing blood ran just below the surface of the skin. Licking  
briefly at the passion mark, he grazed across the broad  
shoulders, once more paying special homage to the many scars  
that marked the pale skin as he worked his way toward the  
nipples that were already tightening in anticipation.

Flat on his back, Qui-Gon let Obi-Wan take the lead, contenting  
himself with running his hands over whatever skin he could  
reach on his lover, occasionally pausing to run his hands  
through his lover's hair. Holding himself up with one arm on  
each side of Qui-Gon's upper body, Obi-Wan kissed his way down  
the well-muscled chest, pouncing upon one nipple with a mock  
growl and ferocious nip, causing a gasp from above. He worked  
the nipple, alternately sucking and nipping, until it was hard  
and red. Qui-Gon's long arms enabled him to easily reach his  
lover's nipples and he began to twist and massage each in turn  
as Obi- Wan kissed his way across the soft skin to the Master's  
second nipple, seizing it in his teeth at the same time he  
twisted hard on the other previously sensitized nipple. This  
move elicited not only a sharp gasp but a surge in their Force  
bond which caused his rapidly hardening cock to jump and  
twitch. He finished his attentions to the nipple, then began to  
cautiously lick and kiss the flat belly, causing a ripple of  
muscles as he alternated feather light licks and hard, sucking  
kisses, then blowing gently on the wet flesh. When he reached  
the navel he swirled his tongue around and inside it as he  
moved one hand over to massage the flesh just above the top of  
the leggings. Feeling a sudden tension in the stomach muscles  
and a flash of quickly damped apprehension across the bond as  
he touched the leggings, he changed directions, urging his  
lover to lie on his side, then began kissing and caressing his  
way up one side of the back towards the shoulder. The tension  
eased again as he used one hand to caress the broad back in  
soothing circles while he kissed the base of the neck. He moved  
over slightly and bit down hard on the top of the shoulder as  
he moved the sweeping caress lower on the back. Quickly  
soothing the bite with licks and kisses, he moved over and  
delicately nibbled on the sensitive ear lobe, sending electric  
spikes over the bond and down to his cock. Qui-Gon turned his  
head up to the side in a mute plea and Obi-Wan obliged by  
capturing the mouth for a searing kiss, tongue delving deep and  
thoroughly exploring the hot cavity. As they kissed, Obi-Wan  
moved his hand just under the edge of the leggings at the base  
of the spine to slowly caress the soft skin at the top of the  
buttocks.

Pulling back from the kiss, Obi-Wan sucked on Qui-Gon's lower  
lip as he tried to gauge the man's readiness to move further.  
By now the bond was humming with tension, but it was a good  
tension which reflected the heightening physical stimulation.  
Qui-Gon opened his eyes, then reached up to trace one finger up  
the side of Obi-Wan's face and across the eyebrow raised in  
silent query.

// Yes, my love //

// Are you sure? I won't do anything to hurt you //

// I trust you. Please, it's time //

Pushing Qui-Gon over so he was face down again, Obi-Wan kissed  
his way down the long spine, pausing at the base to gently nip  
and lick as he carefully eased the leggings down to expose the  
top of the cleft in the buttocks. Sensing only minor  
discomfort, he slid his hands further down to massage the skin  
at the points of the hips as he nuzzled the cleft. Nudging his  
partner to lift his hips, Obi-Wan slid the coverings down the  
long legs and off, dropping them off the side of the bed. He  
moved back to massage and kiss each firm buttock, licking  
across the line at the base of each as he caressed the long  
flanks.

// all right? //

// mmm, feels good //

Taking that as agreement, Obi-Wan proceeded to kiss, lick and  
caress downward on the right leg. Finding a particularly  
sensitive spot behind the knee, he spent extra time nipping and  
licking, causing some wiggling and squirming, before moving  
down. Reaching the right foot, he lifted the foot and gently  
massaged the bottom as he sucked on each toe in turn. After  
repeating the process on the left foot, he worked back up the  
left leg, ending up at the buttocks again. Sliding back up to  
stretch out next to his lover, he ran a hand through the long  
hair as Qui-Gon, now flushed and breathing heavily, turned up  
on his side so they faced each other. The bond now thrummed, a  
constant undercurrent of energy which tingled the nerves. With  
Qui-Gon turned on his side, Obi-Wan could see that the big man  
now sported a truly impressive erection.

"How are you doing?"

"Good. You've been very patient. Thank you."

"You ready to move on? I don't want to go too fast ..."

In answer, Qui-Gon licked his lips, then, tongue sticking out  
in concentration, he reached over to grasp Obi-Wan's hand and  
place it on his cock. Inhaling sharply and shuddering as the  
contact was made, he simply held Obi's hand in place for a long  
moment before nodding and taking his own hand off. The Knight  
gently stroked the long cock as Qui-Gon gathered him in for  
another long kiss. Obi-Wan felt a surge in the bond as Qui-Gon  
seemed to gain confidence and began to take the initiative.

The Master pressed the kiss aggressively, tongues pressing  
wetly together, as he slowly pushed the younger man over onto  
his back. Finally coming up for air, he showered kisses over  
his lover's face as his free hand caressed the younger man's  
shoulder. Another long kiss, deep and hard, then a light kiss  
to the nose before moving to nibble on the Knight's ear.  
Nipping at the base of his neck, Qui-Gon left several red marks  
before moving down to suckle hungrily, alternating between the  
two hard nipples. Skimming a feathery touch down Obi-Wan's  
side, the Master found a particularly sensitive spot across the  
base of the ribs and worked it unmercifully until the Knight  
lay helpless, gasping for breath as Qui-Gon sat up with a huge  
grin.

Qui-Gon's grin turned to a thoughtful smile as his gaze swept  
up and down the flushed and sweating body lying spread across  
his bed.

// You are so beautiful, my love //

// Not half so beautiful as how I see you //

// I want to see you, touch you //

Obi-Wan felt a flush of apprehension and desire across the bond  
as Qui- Gon tentatively reached for the waistband of Obi-Wan's  
leggings.

// You don't have to //

// I need to //

Looking up at Obi-Wan for permission, Qui-Gon grasped the top  
edge of the leggings and very slowly began drawing them  
downward as the young man raised his hips. Having disposed of  
the coverings, Qui-Gon knelt next to Obi-Wan's hips, panting  
and trembling as he eyed the hard cock curving up over the  
man's belly. The Knight sent love and reassurance over the taut  
bond. With sudden determination, Qui-Gon reached out and firmly  
grasped the weeping phallus, stroking it carefully.

// oh! ... that's ... really nice ... //

Obi-Wan moaned // nice is an understatement! //

For quite a while, Qui-Gon continued to stroke and fondle,  
adding a second hand to gently roll and squeeze the balls as  
Obi-Wan continued a low moan.

// Obi-Wan //

// mm? //

// You know, there is something I've wanted to do with you for  
a long time //

// mm-hmm? //

Qui-Gon stopped stroking and looked up at Obi-Wan. "Are you  
listening to me?"

Noticing the sudden loss of delectable friction, Obi-Wan  
groaned in frustration and laboriously levered himself up onto  
one elbow. "Yes, Master."

Qui-Gon bopped him lightly on the end of his cock. "I'm  
serious, I have a request."

"And that's a serious hardon you are seriously neglecting..."

"Please, Obi-Wan."

Obi-Wan ducked his head and sent an image of a repentant  
Padawan over the bond. "Sorry. It's just that you were starting  
to get _really_ good there. What can I do for you, my  
love?"

Qui-Gon closed his eyes and sent a long-cherished image over  
the bond.

Obi-Wan's eyes widened. "Oh Force! When you decide to get rid  
of a hangup in your head, you do it in style. Are you sure  
you're ready for that?"

Qui-Gon gently ran a thumb over the leaking head of Obi-Wan's  
cock and looked down at his own rock hard member. "I really  
want to do this. Please."

Checking the bond, Obi-Wan could still feel a tremor of  
apprehension but it was overridden by a flood of desire and  
lust. He looked up and grinned, then turned on his side as  
Qui-Gon twisted around so they were each lying head to groin.  
Each man reached up to stroke and lick the cock in front of his  
face as the bond surged and crackled. Obi-Wan swirled his  
tongue around the head of Qui-Gon's cock, cleaning off the  
precome and avidly exploring the slit for more as one hand  
continued to fondle the heavy balls. He kissed the head and  
began licking from top to root in long sweeping strokes, then  
sucked each ball in turn, letting his tongue caress the silky  
skin. At the same time, he could feel Qui-Gon licking and  
sucking with enthusiasm, if not experience. Both men's cock's  
were already very hard from the extended foreplay; Obi-Wan knew  
it wouldn't take too much more for both of them to climax. He  
concentrated on making the experience as pleasurable as he  
could for Qui-Gon; wrapping one arm around the man's hips to  
hold him in place, he sucked and nibbled at the balls again  
before licking up the length of the large cock. Leaving one  
hand to continue to squeeze and fondle the balls, he took the  
head into his mouth again, swirling his tongue across the slit  
once before drawing the length into his mouth and sucking hard.  
As he felt Qui-Gon follow his lead and suck his cock into the  
hot wetness of his mouth, Obi-Wan could also begin to feel the  
bond bringing them closer together as the energy level  
continued to build. Moving up and down on the heavy phallus,  
Obi-Wan's world contracted to the cock in his mouth and the  
white heat at his own groin. Both men began moving more  
frantically as the pressure built ever higher. Through the  
bond, Obi-Wan could feel the silk covered steel shaft in his  
mouth at the same time he could feel his own cock in Qui-Gon's  
hot mouth. The simultaneous sensations of the wet suction on  
two thrusting cocks was rapidly driving the two men to a shared  
orgasm; pulling Qui-Gon's cock as far into his throat as far as  
possible, he could feel Qui-Gon's balls begin to tighten under  
his fingertips. His own balls tightened in sympathetic unison  
and shortly both men erupted in a convulsive explosion. Obi-Wan  
felt the hot stream leave his body as a burst of fireworks and  
blue fire went off behind his eyelids. Two throats eagerly  
swallowed the milky seed, then tenderly milked the softening  
cocks of their last offerings.

Qui-Gon pulled himself around to lie next to Obi-Wan, both men  
collapsing into a sated embrace. The bond vibrated softly,  
enveloping the limp bodies in a mellow glow. Obi-Wan lay in  
blissful euphoria; he could feel Qui-Gon physically next to him  
and also joined with him in their bond. For a long while they  
simply existed in the moment as they slowly recovered their  
breath and equanimity.

Eventually Obi-Wan stirred, leaning over to plant a kiss at the  
base of Qui-Gon's neck and lick lazily at the salty sweat  
pooled there. Qui- Gon roused and pulled the young man up for a  
long slow kiss, each savoring the taste of their own essence in  
the other's mouth.

// ... love you ... // Qui-Gon sent.

// always and all ways, my love //

// ... mmm, we haven't gotten to the all ways part yet ... //

// You know, for somebody that two hours ago couldn't even  
touch someone else's cock, you're suddenly awfully randy //

// I'm just realizing how much I missed out on all those years.  
I am immensely grateful for your help in teaching me how to  
overcome that nonsense I let sit in my head all that time //

// Then it would be my honor and pleasure to continue as your  
instructor, Master Jinn //

// And it would be my honor and very great pleasure to be your  
student, Knight Kenobi //

Obi-Wan sensed a sudden shift of mood as Qui-Gon propped  
himself up on one elbow and lay looking down at him.

"Knight Kenobi," Qui-Gon said slowly, as if tasting the sound  
of each syllable.

"Yeesss, that was me the last time I looked," Obi-Wan drawled.  
"Is something wrong?"

"Knight Kenobi," Qui-Gon said again slowly, eyes closed as his  
free hand began to trace lazy circles on Obi's belly.

Obi-Wan waited patiently in silence, knowing that eventually  
the Master would be ready to discuss whatever was bothering  
him.

Five minutes later, Qui-Gon opened his eyes to look down into  
his lover's blue-green orbs, his hand never ceasing its  
sweeping caress.

"Obi-Wan Kenobi, I love you."

"And I love you, Qui-Gon Jinn. You are the other half of my  
heart and my soul."

"I want you to make a promise to me, Obi-Wan Kenobi."

Sensing that the Master had turned very serious now, Obi-Wan  
replied, "of course, Qui-Gon."

"It is one thing to find the one you love, the one who  
completes you and makes you whole. However, it can be far more  
difficult to keep that one after you have found them. If we are  
to work together and live together, then I think we will both  
need to work hard at keeping that love. I can be difficult to  
live with as a lover; aside from being stubborn and prideful, I  
told you once that I am jealous and possessive of that which I  
hold closest to my heart, and it is unfortunately all too true.  
And if we are to work together, then for a long time to come it  
will be as Master and Knight, and I have a tendency to let that  
Master's authority and control carry over in my private life.  
In our official duties we will do what is appropriate and  
needful, of course, but in our private lives, when it is just  
the two of us, I want us to be equal partners in this  
relationship. It may take a while to really make that work  
properly, but do you understand what I am trying to say?"

"Yes, I believe so. When it's just us, it is Qui-Gon and  
Obi-Wan; when it's official it's Master Jinn and Knight Kenobi.  
I agree that is how I would like it to be and how it should  
be."

"Well, wanting it and having it can two very different things,  
and I have been known to do some pretty stupid things sometimes  
that have hurt people I care for. Obi-Wan Kenobi, I want you to  
promise me that when I do one of those stupid things, you will  
be strong enough to get the biggest stick you can find and hit  
me over the head with it."

Obi-Wan grinned, "Qui-Gon, much as I might enjoy it, I can't go  
around bashing senior Masters like that."

Qui-Gon captured Obi-Wan's hand and held it to his heart.  
"Please, this is very important to me. You are a good man, and  
I don't want you to let me get away with hurting you or  
treating you with less than the respect you have earned and  
deserve. Please promise me that you will be strong for both of  
us, Obi-Wan Kenobi."

Listening to their bond and looking up into the  
passion-darkened blue eyes, the young Knight could tell how  
desperately important this was to his lover. Taking a deep  
breath, he replied softly, "Qui-Gon Jinn, from my heart to your  
heart, this promise is for you. I will love you as long as my  
heart still beats and beyond, I will honor that love and do  
nothing to dishonor it, I will be strong when you are weak, I  
will lean on your strength when I am in need, I will learn from  
your wisdom, I will be your partner in life to support and  
defend you. On my honor as a Jedi Knight, this promise I make."

Qui-Gon released the hand he had been holding and gathered his  
love into his arms. He kissed him solemnly, then whispered,  
"Obi-Wan Kenobi, from my heart to your heart, this promise is  
for you. I will love you as long as my heart still beats and  
beyond, I will honor that love and do nothing to dishonor it, I  
will be strong when you are weak, I will lean on your strength  
when I am in need, I will listen when you speak, I will teach  
you all that I have learned, I will be your partner in life to  
support and defend you. On my honor as a Jedi Master, this  
promise I make."

The two men embraced fiercely, Master and Knight, lovers and  
friends. Two hearts beat as one, the gentle glow of their  
combined Force power a shimmering shield to light their way.  
One long kiss to seal the pact and promise many more nights to  
come. Then, pulling a blanket up to cover them, they held each  
other, skin to skin and heart to heart, as they drifted off to  
sleep. One last thought went up into the Force ...

// ... love you ... //

finis

  
  



End file.
